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Death would be so much better than this!

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Crackedgrl, Oct 30, 2012.

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  1. Crackedgrl

    Crackedgrl New Member

    I finally found a place where others are thinking like me. I have struggled with depression on and off for years. But I'm at my limit now. I cannot handle anymore emotional and mental agony. I beg God for death but it will not come. I want to kill myself, but I stop because of my sons. I love them, but they are growing up and when they r grown then I will serve no purpose at all I'm in my second marriage to a verbally abusive man who hates me, but I don't hate him and I just found out he has heart disease and my first husband died in a car accident. Life is nothing but pain and loss. I wish I wasn't scared to just end it already, but I am afraid of going to Hell. My roadblocks to finishing the job are only two, my sons and fear of Hell. Is there ever any relief for someone in this mental state?
  2. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Re: Death would be so muh better than this!

    I am sorry it has been a struggle for you. Some problems are more difficult than others. Sometimes there are things a person can "do" to help the problems go away- sometimes it is something we have no control over. I am not sure there is ever a time when a child's mother does not a serve a purpose - as you well know things do not always get easier growing up and some of your hard won experience will serve them for many years as they grow themselves. Sometimes relief can be found in something so small as a real life or online friend to talk to - really talk to- sometimes that is an outlet that helps you process through things. Many people find that the right medication can help a great deal to alleviate the stress to a bearable level. I hope you are able to find some strength and support from members here as well.

    Take Care and Be Safe

  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Re: Death would be so muh better than this!

    Hi and welcome...No one can do this alone, so please if you have not already, reach out for help...you have experienced so many losses, including that of your safety from the abuse you are experiencing...and yes, your sons need you, no matter how old they are as you sound like a loving caring mother...most importantly,are you safe now? That is the main concern...not sure where you live, but I know members throughout the world here have dealt with these issues, so please recruit their help should you need it...welcome again and so glad you posted
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