Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by morning rush, Oct 21, 2009.

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  1. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I'm not feeling good at feels like my insides are shaking and I'm stuck...I can't focus or do anything...I'm useless...I just want to end it...I wish I had the guts to do it...I'm tired of thinking, of feeling...I have such a hard time to do everyday things, even showering is a burden...If I was dead then all of this would be over...

    I do take meds but I think I've outgrown them, I have the hardest time falling asleep because of my of my meds was prescribe for that but at one point it was raised to the point that I gain lots of weight...the doctor had to reduce them and once he did that I stopped gaining weight...

    Just getting up and even breathing is such a big effort...death would be so much better....
  2. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    You are such an intelligent, kind, loving and lovable soul!!! Please...Please...Please hold on. I know that you have good days and bad and yesterday was sounding so good. It will pass. You are so loved.

  3. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    thanks for responding shades, you're the only one who did...I guess no one really would have been nice to have a few comforting responses...but maybe I'm not in the immediate response of ripping my throat out so I'm not worthy of a response...sometimes I wonder why bother posting if no one's there to comment...

    thanks again shades...
  4. Tobes

    Tobes Well-Known Member

    You need to be more patient and give people a chance. Some people have lives to live, and I have noticed that this forum can be quite slow on the replies of peoples comments. I agree, more people should have commented, but you didn't give them anything to comment to. All you said, in a nutshell, is that I'm so useless, I feel bad, I want to die. You need to put more effort into your posts and let us know how you're feeling and what problems you need help with.

    And don't say that nobody cares. I understand that you are feeling bad at the moment but that statement is an insult to every good and decent person on these forums, the same that will be there to talk to you and help you out.
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Your not alone.. There are quite a few of us who have self esteem issues.. As far as your meds not working, well maybe it's time for a change..I think I have been on every med am currently on a high dose of effexor and it has helped with my depression quite a bit.. What does he have you on for your anxiety??The meds aren't a wonder cure, there only ment to help take the edge of of your thoughts..Therapy would do wonders for you.. Sometimes I think being in therapy works better than anything else..I just recently quit going to therapy because of finances.. I can already see my old fears slowly creeping back in..We are here for you so don'tstop posting.. Sometimes members are slow in responding..Take care..
  6. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Have you tried going to the doctor and asking for different meds?? The reason why it takes so long for people to reply on here is the different time-zones., thats what ive put it down to anyway!! People do care, just give us a chance we'll help ya if we can.
  7. chooselife

    chooselife Well-Known Member

    I agree with Stranger1. Therapy worked wonders for me, especially group therapy which is what ultimately bought me out of my shell and gave me self esteem again. You feel unworthy, but you should give yourself more credit.

    Also, I have only just noticed your post so don't be so hard on us and yourself. It is not that people do not care.
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi limow!

    I agree with everyone that suggested therapy! Therapy lessened my depression a lot.
    Sorry you felt no one cared because of the lack of replies..we do care, sometimes people just don't know how to reply or feel they can't add to whats already been said :hug:
  9. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    Thank you for responding, I said what I said because I had posted before and only got one response and then no one else had responded...I understand that people have lives to live, that's not the point...this is a help site...that's why I posted to get a bit of good advice...

    As for therapy I've been in therapy since I was 16 (for ten years) and I dunno I don't feel it's helping so I stopped going for a year...I'm mostly alone all the time...

    I take seroquel, celexa and effexor for my anxiety and depression...I know they don't cure illness but I was really in bad shape yesterday...I even thought of cutting myself...I haven't cut in over a year...
  10. Tobes

    Tobes Well-Known Member

    I think its fantastic that you haven't cut. One less cutter makes the world a better place, in my opinion (I'm not wishing they would die, just wishing they would stop). I'm not trying to diss cutters because I don't understand their motivation, but I see it as a pointless, dangerous and damaging thing to do. I agree that meds don't cure depression, only alleviate it (even then minimally) but I know that therapy can do wonders. If you don't have one, how about someone you can openly talk to about how you feel? If you don't, you have us, so it's ok.

    Once again if you are looking for advice you have to be patient for a reply, but one will come, and you can't blame people for not replying as soon as you'd like them to.

    I wonder why this site doesn't have a therapy forum because it would help people out a lot. Maybe there aren't any/many qualified therapists as members, but there should be dammit. Even so, you don't need a qualification to give helpful and therapeutic advice.

    I wish you all the best
  11. silverlotus

    silverlotus Member

    I, too, think it's great that you haven't cut! I struggle with self injury still and I know how frusterating that whole thought process can be. I can understand why you'd be frusterated with therapy but it might be a good idea to get back into it. I go for the mere fact of having someone to vent to. Just having that is a little helpful, and we gotta take what we can get.

    I'm new here, but it seems like a lot of people here care about you. And you can always PM me if you need to.
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