Delusional Theory

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Hache, Oct 3, 2010.

  1. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    I've come up with a theory I thought I'd share and see what others think.

    I believe that my depression in its current state (which is not permanent but more a reaction, perhaps based on what my mind knows as a reaction from passed depression), is caused and fixed by delusion.

    What I mean is I can be fine, brilliant, dandy, all because I believe in a possibility, I become happy in today by a dream as to what tomorrow might have. Once that is shattered or I realize the reality of it all I become depressed, or have a bad reaction, this lasts until the next delusion is born.

    Let me give you a few examples :

    Just under a year ago now I was all troubled about where is my life going, where can I be and go to get X, Y and Z. Then a long came this advert at uni for going to the US in the summer, all of a sudden I saw that as an opportunity to experience what I thought was missing, I then began to build my dream around it. I went to the seminars, spent a couple of weeks believing in this dream, this fantasy. Then when I came back down to earth I was back to the start after feeling ok for a couple of weeks.

    More recently and perhaps more frequently is infatuation with someone. When that gets shattered I feel awful about everything. Even though all along I didn't know that person at all really. I'd spent days creating a fantasy world.

    Or perhaps take girls in general, just one smile or one sign of interest, perhaps even the idea of going out or going to a party and I begin to feel like I have a chance, maybe this time I will meet someone. Then after that is over and I realise it didn't happen like the fantasy I feel awful.


    So, my theory is that my depression hasn't gone I'm just delusional. I'm using fantasy to get through.

    Do I try and beat this back, is it possible without depression or do I carry on until one day maybe I get that lucky break which gives me a today, a reality that is happy and not the fantasy I am chasing.
     
  2. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    I don't think hope is a delusion, at least not in the typical sense of the word. I do believe what you are saying, however. It's only by staying hopeful that you can survive depression.
     
  3. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    I 'live' much of my life in this situation. I don't have a very eventful social life, nor do I really know how to create one. But I'm so bored or unhappy with my situation that I create my own alternate realities. It's only as of recently that I've started to sleep more, or to just get away from everyone and just sit in my room and do nothing. That's when I tend to imagine. But once I realise that won't happen, I tend to get intensely sad and depressed. I've always thought that my body is stuck in the present and my mind is 10 years in the future.
     
  4. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    This.

    THIS!

    Yes! This is EXACTLY what I feel!
     
  5. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    I guess it ties in with hope, but the problem is the fantasising isn't realistic.