Depersonalization or defense mechanism?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by will_1957, Jan 23, 2010.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. will_1957

    will_1957 Well-Known Member

    This has only happened in the past year or so, and I don't know what's going on. There are times when I don't feel quite in control of myself. I feel really distanced from what I do. I will feel disconnected and afterwards when I think about it I feel weird and confused because I feel like I'm not really there.

    Sometimes it feels like I don't feel like I have an identity. I sort of forget that I'm a person and that I'm engaged in the world. It's really hard to explain but an example is just feeling weird looking in the mirror because I can see that I'm actually there and it's almost like I can't recognize myself for a second.

    This hasn't gotten really severe until this past year so I am not really sure why that would be. About 4 or 5 months ago I got a cashier job where I had to deal with a lot of people and I have really severe social anxiety. I thought maybe I had developed a defense mechanism in an attempt to try to take me out of a distressing situation but I find that when I feel outside myself like that it only makes me feel worse.

    I don't know what it could be because I think it developed before I got my newest job but I really don't know if it's full-blown depersonalization because it doesn't seem as severe as what some people experience.

    This was too long and I don't expect any one to read it or care but at least I got it out there.
  2. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I read it, all of it.

    This to me is a very interesting topic and mind you I am not a mental health professional but I have a lot of training in Buddhism and Hinduism.

    How does my spiritual beliefs relate to this topic? Well we are taught to detact ourselves from ourselves and "witness" or watch ourselves carry out our daily activities. After a while you get the sensation you are describing but it is not uncomfortable nor does it feel wrong or scary.

    I have heard a few things about depersonalization and it sound a bit more "extreme" like you mentioned so wonder if you are not inadvertently practicing an exercise taught by Eastern schools of thought?

    I am not sure if this reply helps but like I said I find this topic very interesting and so really liked your post.

    May I ask do you feel scared when it happens? Any sense of comfort and less attached to what you are doing?

    Thanks for the post and sorry if my reply is not very helpful, Bambi
  3. History

    History Well-Known Member

    when i had it, it wasnt a form of defense mechanism. Had it for a few months and it scared the shit out of me cos I thought I could never return back to normal. Luckily, over time, it went away. It's hell of a frightening though feeling that way continuosly 24/7 for a few months. Never knew when it would end.
  4. skittles13

    skittles13 Member

    what you are experiancing will fall into one of 2 catagories

    De-personalisation - what your stating is textbook depersonalisation, no doubt in my mind.

    Dissosiation - the depersonalisation could be a symptom of something greater, aka dissociation. thats the case with me aparently so that may be the case here as well.
  5. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I'm not familiar with the term depersonalization. I have experience everything being surreal to me where I didn't feel connected. It's a strange place to be.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.