Depressed... Again

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Hello everyone, I'm back. I am 16 years old and I have depression. I am feeling really down as of lately and have not been able to leave the house or go to school. I was with this girl and things were wonderful between us, and then a couple nights ago she brought up that she was leaving for college in a year, most likely out of state and so we started talking about it. She is 18 and a senior and I'm a sophmore. So we kinda started fighting about it and then we broke up. We still like each other but she feels it is best that we don't get even more attached because if we do we will only end up hurting ourselves more when she has to leave, I don't know what I feel is best. I can't stop crying over knowing shes gone when we still like each other. I really could see spending the rest of my life with her. I feel as though I deserve this pain for some reason. I want her so badly. I havn't been eating much and havn't felt hungry lately. I also skipped taking my anti-depressants a couple days. I don't want to go to school because I'll have to see her and it will hurt and yet I want to see her and hold her again. And I also want to see my friends but then of course theres all that work I missed, and the pressure of my entire future from success in high school. I am also sick of just sitting around at home having these thoughts run trhough me day in and day out. They are relentless in making me feel worse. I don't have a councilor, I did but he died a couple months ago. What should I do? I'm so lost, so confused, please help me. Thanks to anyone that even bothers to read all this.
The sound of familar feelings. My wife left me a year ago. We had one son together then and I didn't even want to go see or pick him up because I'd see her. I love her ememsly. I couldn't work. I became severely depressed and suicidal. I basically stayed home and cried and cried. Any time I tried to talk with her she was nonreceptive and we ended up getting mad at each other. Finally someone gave me the advice to just step back and leave her alone. I told them that I didn't like that idea and I wasn't going to do it. Things kept getting worse and worse. Finally, I was like what do I have to loose? So, I stopped calling, and only came by to get my son, and then left immediately.

Now at this point one of two things will happen. Either you will grow appart and your feelings and heart will deal with the loss and move on and become whole again. Or, you'll get lucky like I did and she'll see that your backing out and are serious and she'll not truely want to let go, so she'll come running back. Either way it's a win win situation for you. A--you'll feelings will heal or B--you'll get back together.

Don't know what else to tell you other than good luck! Keep your head up and remember to smile.
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