depressed again

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by magenta, Jun 1, 2012.

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  1. magenta

    magenta New Member

    I'm so sick of depression. Yes, it eventually gets better, but it always comes back. I feel like I'm merely waiting for the next episode to begin even when I'm not depressed. Two days ago, I started making a suicide plan. I have a plan in place, but no immediate plan to use it yet. I'm still deciding. I have kids that I don't want to be scarred for life, but at the same time, I think they're better off without a mom who can't keep her shit together. My illness has only put my family in the poor house. I just want it to end.
  2. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    I had someone, the other day, compare depression to the weather. It makes a lot of sense. There are rainy days with clouds, but then there are sunny days as well. The sunny days have us out and about, playing in the parks, taking walks, picnics, ball games, etc. The rainy days we sit at home and look out the window feeling glum and down, waiting for the skies to clear again. This is much like life. We weather these storms and we go forward because the sunny days are worth the wait. They really are.
  3. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    Been there, done that, will probably be there again soon. It does come and go. Yes, it always comes back, but I think for me at least that's only because I never got rid of the root. I think of my depression like a weed. I can chop it down, but unless I attack the root cause, it will always grow back. I know where the roots of my pain are, and I think I know what will kill them... I know the solution, I just don't have any way to obtain the solution.
  4. sadguy33

    sadguy33 Banned Member

    Just try to think about your kids and how much they love you and need you. You can get through this!!!
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