Depressing thoughts

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by poppoob, Sep 13, 2008.

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  1. poppoob

    poppoob New Member

    Depression has just killed my feeling to do anything anymore and the only time Im happy is when im around the girl I love and since im always happy around her she doesnt know how bad Ive been feeling

    Lately all I do is just like sit there and like stare at the wall and think and i try not to think about stuff but its like depressing thoughts just come to me for no reason
    Ive stoped eating as much as i used for some reason i don't see friends anymore and like all day long I start crying and sometimes I start screaming while crying

    people tell me to get help but I really dont want help I want to feel this way but I dont and
    I dont know
  2. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni


    just to say i hope you feel better soon
  3. lilella44

    lilella44 Well-Known Member

    im so sorry to hear you feel this way.
    you should get help for these feelings, even if its just going to the doctor - maybe its something physical thats wrong.
    whats making you feel this way?
  4. pittfall

    pittfall Active Member

    Hi...I feel the same way as you do. When I am around the guy I fell in love with four years ago, I am happy. Whether it be on the phone, in a text message or in person. The only problem with that is that he doesn't love me anymore. Sure, he still calls me everyday and texts me everyday, but he never wants to do anything with me. In the past two years, he only has time to see me in the middle of the night about once a month. He is so nice to me and I do feel he cares about me deeply. I am so in love with him. I miss him deeply each day that I don't get to see him. When he calls me or sends a text (he does everyday), I feel warm and wanted. I am so confused.

    I spend most of my time working and try to concentrate solely on work. Once I am alone, I feel so deeply depressed. I don't think I can make it through another holiday season alone.

    I have no friends, family within 4000 miles or anyone to talk to. I have social anxiety almost to the point of never leaving my house, except to work. I want a friend...I want a boyfriend (relationship)...I want to feel alive again. I have tried to make friends at work, but have given up after a year of trying. I have tried to form relationships, but all the men I dated turned out to be either married or wanted a young beautiful woman with a perfect body while the men were around my age of 45. I gave that up too.

    I have lost my appetite, I am frightened of leaving the house. I am getting more and more depressed everyday.

    My nest is empty and I miss my kids so much. I have been alone for 2 years. This is the first time in my life I have been alone. Married right out of high school then had a baby. Ten years later another baby then divorced. Both kids have told me they would rather stay with their husbands than come across the country for a visit with me...all expenses paid.

    I am so confused, lonely, lost, hurt, sad, unloved...

    I have recently started seeing a psychologist. Once a week doesn't seem like enough for me. I feel I am pretty bad off as far as depression goes.

    I try to hold the tears i until I get home, but sometimes I have to find a place to be alone at work to cry.

    I'm just a really f****d up soul.

    I hate myself.
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 22, 2008
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