To be honest i still feel uneasy creating Topics regardiny such personal feelings and experiences so im going to apologise for whats below as it wont give much insight. However for some reason i felt great today [well for about an hour anyway] feeling like i finally came out of my depression, decided to jump in the shower actually dress smart for once and go out to the cinemas with friends. Then 10 minutes after getting dressed i suddenly felt terrible... a friend came through the door and shut the door behind him i actually felt like slamming the door on my head. I was that depressed, as usual things only got worse friends couldnt get the money to go cinemas, nor did i actually feel like going anymore. Anyway it led me to relise... Depression is just a dark cloud hanging over you when you look up at the sky it looks dark and bleak. When the dark clouds clear and you look up you see the sun shining and you can suddenly see everything clearly everything feels clear to you - your mind is free and you finally have hope. Now i feel even worse i was given hope and happiness and when i started to enjoy it ... it was taken away from me. Dont really expect any response, i know it's pretty poor grammer just wanted to share it.