I have been struggling with deep hard thoughts and feelings of suicide that's how I ended up here a couple of days and for the past two days I didn't feel any urges but this morning I woke up and despair filled every ounce of me and I found myself walking over to my cabinet where my pills are. I don't want to die but I feel like I can't live with the pain I feel in my chest and my soul. I feel like the loneliest girl in the world. I wish I had a hug right now. I feel so detached from the world. I want my family so bad. I dont know how to keep hanging on when my despair is this big...bigger than me it feels like right now.