Desperate once again on the brink

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Agirlwhosad, Aug 14, 2016.

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  1. Agirlwhosad

    Agirlwhosad Member

    I have been struggling with deep hard thoughts and feelings of suicide that's how I ended up here a couple of days and for the past two days I didn't feel any urges but this morning I woke up and despair filled every ounce of me and I found myself walking over to my cabinet where my pills are. I don't want to die but I feel like I can't live with the pain I feel in my chest and my soul. I feel like the loneliest girl in the world. I wish I had a hug right now. I feel so detached from the world. I want my family so bad. I dont know how to keep hanging on when my despair is this big...bigger than me it feels like right now.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    You are not alone in feeling lonely. A lot of us here suffer from chronic loneliness, it's not uncommon especially around depressed and anious people. Talk to us here and we can help fill in the gap that is missing in your life. We're all here for more or less the same reason so it will/should be easier to talk to us! What do you usually do when you feel very down? What are your usual distractions?
    Agirlwhosad likes this.
  3. lifetalkz

    lifetalkz Well-Known Member

    What I always remember, when I feel very lonely and in need of a hug is-I matter, too. I extend to myself all of the love and kindness that I can't receive from the people I am missing. Learning how to love and comfort ourselves when we are alone is a worthwhile endeavor. I hope that you will be around the people you care about soon-until then, think well of yourself because you matter too. Best wishes-LT :)
    Agirlwhosad likes this.
  4. Deety

    Deety SF Supporter

    Cyber hugs to you. What methods of communication do you have with your family? They must miss you so much too. Can you find support and friends where you are? Who do you have regular contact with where you live for now? You may need to reach out for some in-person support from people around you as well as here, as this journey back to your family may take some time (as I saw in one of your other posts). I really feel for you, you are in a very difficult situation. Take care.
  5. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid We either find a way, or make one. SF Supporter

    You can almost feel the empathy here Agirlwhosad, people who have felt the same depth of feelin that you are experiencing, so please understand that you are not alone when you are here, only in the real world. So talk to us and allow us to be a temporary family, lets us become your friends because its what we do here at SF. Feeling suicidal is a feeling most of us here completely understand and many of us have come through attempts and have decided to try and prevent others going through what we ourselves went through.

    So dont be alone, come to SF, spend some time with us, read, post, chat, whatever you feel like, but just distract yourself for now from the feelings you are having about ending your life. Together, we can overcome almost anything.

    Disconnected likes this.
  6. Disconnected

    Disconnected Member

    I hope you feel better now, and like Petal said; a lot of us are lonely (including me)
    And SinisterKid is right, we all have each other here on SF, so if you ever feel lonely just come here and we'll all try to cheer you up. =)
  7. moxman

    moxman The "Perfect Life" YouTube channel is neat

    Hey Agirl,

    What you are going through is normal, we all have our good days and we all have our bad days. With all of the stuff you have going on in your life no wonder you feel the way you do. It is A LOT. I know you feel pain because you are separated from your family. You did the right thing, you had a bad day and you came to us for help. We are going to help you emotionally. Together we will get through this,

    Have you thought about taking language classes and learning the local language? Maybe do some volunteer work and make some friends? You're going to have to build your own support network, I have faith in you that you can do it. Your going to be in this situation for a long time. I am sorry you are going through this , I know you miss your boys and your husband. I know it is not fair and it is unjust to separate a mother from her children.

    If you feel like you are in danger, please go to the closest ER and get help. Your kids need their mom,they always will.

    Take Care of Yourself
  8. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi, welcome to the forum. LIFE IS IMPORTANT AND INCLUDES YOU. I will reply to your post when I log on next time. I promise to help YOU.
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