Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by fluffyjo, Aug 20, 2007.

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  1. fluffyjo

    fluffyjo New Member

    This is my first post on here. Guess i just wanted to pour my heart out to anybody who'd listen.
    Have suffered from depression for nearly 20 years but things have got alot worse recently. I attempted suicide 2 weeks ago and ended up in hospital. To be honest things havent got much better since then. I feel guilty coz i have kids but i often wonder if they'd be better off without me around. I've been ill recently with a stomach problem that the doctors cant explain as a result of that i lost my job through having so much time off sick. My husband and i barely speak to each other and we are on the verge of breaking up. I have no money coz the benefit system have messed up and basically i feel like crap. I just cant see another way out at the moment, i cry 24 7 and thats not fair on my kids. Im addicted to sleeping pills and cant get any sleep without them. I do have an appointment with a pshyciatrist on august 31st but dont know if i can hold on that long. Thought about suicide again today. Think imanaged to pull myself out of it but i dont trust myself. Its almost like someone else has taken over my body and i have no control over it.
  2. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed


    first off :welcome: to the forum. we are very glad you've found us. i want to make sure that you know we will do our best to be here for you. please use us as a sounding board (that talks back). i have children also and i know what it is like to be in your shoes. i have suffered from depression for over 30 yrs now. there are ways through this although it may seem as though there are not. i can most assuredly tell you there is. it's managing to find the patience through it. just please continue to share and get things off of your chest and we will continue to listen.

    please, please take care
  3. Darkness N Light

    Darkness N Light Staff Alumni

    Hello and welcome to the forum. I am so sorry that you are feeling this way. I hope that we are able to help you through your hard times. If you ever need to talk I am here for you. I can't honestly that I have never thought about suicide because I have and that was right after my fiance killed himself and then 2 days after I placed him in the ground I lost my daughter too.
    One thing I can honestly say is that no matter what is going on is that your children would be better off without you. A child needs his or her mother. I know it hurts to lose a mother to death and I hate to think about how it feels to lose one to suicide. My own mother is still alive but when my best friend's mother died I felt completely abreft and so did my friend. Her mom was just like a mother to me. I know what it feels like to lose someone you love dearly to suicide and that just about killed me.
    If you ever need to talk I am only a pm away. Take care and I love you. :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss

    With Love,
    Crystal :hug: :cheekkiss
  4. fluffyjo

    fluffyjo New Member

    well i attempted to slit my wrists last night. Not paticularly successfully. Things just seem to be getting worse. Dont know what else to say really. Except life is crap.:sad:
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