did it mess you up for life?

Discussion in 'Bullying and Violence' started by faeriegirl, Feb 21, 2008.

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  1. faeriegirl

    faeriegirl Active Member

    Girls are cruel.....very cruel. I was bullies incessantly from age 6 though age 17 by the "mean girls" in my school. I am now 27 and I can honestly say, those girls screwed up my head big time. Funnnily enough, it was my SORORITY sisters that for the first time in my life that I got a respite from all that nonsense. Anyone else?
  2. BlackPegasus

    BlackPegasus Well-Known Member

    Same here as far as being bullied and I do think it has messed me up quite a lot. In fact I was just thinking about this the other day.
  3. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    It has fucked me up pretty good for now, but for life I don't know.
  4. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    As far as that goes the answer is yes. I'm so full of hatred because of it. And the memories won't leave me, :(
  5. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Yeah...I'd have to say it's quite a big part of the reason why I'm here...Girls, and guys, can be fucking awful, awful people.
  6. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    How very true....bullying has totally fucked me up mentally....the scary thing is, it doesn't have to be physical bullying...even when it's just words, sorta sticks in your mind for a long time afterwards...it's been 3 years since I left high school and I still haven't gotten over it....and now I have serious 'trust' issues when meeting other ppl...I find it very hard to trust anyone...I always think that they've got some hidden motive and it makes me quite paranoid to be around large groups of ppl....I've adopted this attitude now where I just think that all ppl are assholes, and I appear very bitter because of it....

    ....bullying should be tackled very early on, or it changes a person's perception of the world later on in adolescent life...ppl need to realize that their actions may have an impact on the rest of a person's life.
  7. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    I wasn't bullied. I say I wasn't but at the age of 11-12 I knew I had to get away from the dynamic between boys and girls because everything changed then and suddenly everyone (especially girls) started becoming pieces of meat. And I was definitely bullied I think even younger than that by one girl...the group I was around with didn't like that I was very good academically and felt threatened by this and I just felt completely out of place with all the girls changing themselves for boys and boys suddenly having such power over a girl's way of looking at herself. I suppose that effected my eating disorder because I never wanted/ and was very conscious at even that young age of being objects for men and felt I needed to hide/starve myself. I'm so fucking glad I went to a girls school for the rest of my life - I think it made me a lot more self assured and enforced my confidence and I was quite happy at where I was until I was 16. But definitely the later primary school days didn't do me much good but I think I dealt with it well, doing my usual 'shut them off, they don't exist' technique.

    When I was at university, I had men putting my work down/me because I had done a lot (and it was different and I screamed). I had a man who was definitely attracted to me laughing with his female friend over my stutter but he only could talk to me when he was alone and blushing, poor him :sad:. I was told by a tutor I got along with not to go to a certain art school because of the misogyny that goes on in crits and that women were always being shouted down. So much for 'cutting edge' institutions..
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2008
  8. Bloodrose

    Bloodrose Member

    It messed me up and eventually contributed to my schizophrenia. I can't work or study or socialise now IRL, because i'll always mess up everything. I'm always bullied and totally invalidated by the people and delusions around me, where I live. There is no place in my house where I can go to have some peace.

    The only time I could ignore the constant bullying these days, is to not care about life and others anymore. It rewrecked my soul and consicence in the process.
  9. DaGame

    DaGame Member

    Not as much. But, I am so pissed of at the fact that this person i know bullied(s) so many god damn people and gets away with it! I get these feeling where i want to bust him in the head with a pipe!!!
  10. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I was bullied when I was in grade 7 and 8, but now that I'm 27, I can honestly say that I've put it behind me and have moved on. Things like this, you have to let it go, or else it will continue eating away at you.
  11. Someone

    Someone Active Member

    It does get better easily?
    I feel so trapped and cornered. This has completely changed what I think on society, people and just humans in general.
  12. trux

    trux Well-Known Member

    Same, and it doesn't get better for me
  13. BOLIAO

    BOLIAO Guest

    I was not bullied as a kid nor as a teenager. Was brought up in a good family. Did rather well academically. However, my world turned ugly when I started work. I couldn't adapt to office bullying. Office bullyings has killed me, my career and also my future.
  14. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Did it cause me to be the way I am? Probably not. But it definitely didn't help. It can only hurt. And it does. It still does. And I wasn't even really bullied that much. I actually kind of asked for some of it but I didn't realize it at the time. And of course, when you feel like you're the innocent party, you're going to see the other party as "the bad guys". And that's the way you're going to remember it. It doesn't hurt any less if you kind of egged them on.
  15. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    No. It doesn't get better easily. But it gets easier to put behind you as time moves on. I carried a lot of hate and anger with me for a long time. At some point, I realized it wasn't doing me (or anyone else) any good to dwell on it forever.
  16. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Yeah. The workplace can be a nasty place to be too. Some people never really grow up. Bullies especially. They just get bigger.

    My last boss was a typical bully. He'd walk by me and kick my shoe or push me or something and call me some name. He almost succeeded at provoking me eventually but I did the smart thing and just left.
  17. miss sixty

    miss sixty Active Member

    I was bullied never told my parents till after i left school think this is what caused my depression used to stay in my room all day and cry, used to cry every morning and night thinking about school.

    Mark my hubby helped me from when we first met, my parents didn't do much, my mom got me to a friend of hers for counsel only went once then thought was better..obv not tho.

    I used to try and self harm but mark always stopped me, he is such a sweetie.

    He must never know i come here..
  18. Freakstorm

    Freakstorm Member

    I hate to think that bullying messed me up for life, because in real life, people tend to put down bullying as something that's normal, that everyone goes through and that isn't a serious f orm of abuse, so I feel pathetic admitting that yes I was bullied, and many doctors have said my mental health problems have been affected/caused by it in som ewa.y I feel very vulnerable talking about it even here, but I've been looking around the net for some time, as in the last few weeks feelings I had as a child have been so privalent, and it has just really helped me to see people talking openly about bullying. I hope to stick around and maybe give some support to you all. :)
  19. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    I wasn't bullied alot in school but people never talked to me. I think all through high school I had maybe 2-3 close friends everyone else just ignored me like I didn't exist. It's funny and maybe sick to think this way but part of me wishes they did beat me up so that way I was at least noticed. I don't know sick or what not it's how I felt then. Now, I just have this mentality of fuck them over before they can fuck me over. I put up a good front so people think I'm a bitch so they'll just leave me alone. It's more damaging in the end I guess b/c once again like high school I'm left alone with no one. It's really a double edged sword.
  20. diver200

    diver200 Senior Member

    It sure didn't help much. That is for sure. I got into a different crowd for high school, and it was better, but from elementary and junior high, it was near on constant. In my 9th grade year (junior high school), I and a few other who were sick of the bullying, "ganged" together for protection. We even took to carrying knives to school. One of those friends later killed his family, and is in a mental institution to this day.

    As a parent, I saw definite negative effects on my son. We were in Colorado when the Columbine incident occured, and even after that the bullying persisted. My son felt powerless to stop it. The school had a policy that if both kids did not agree as to what happened, then it was not considered to be true. So all the bully had to do was lie about what happened, and it would be okay. That was tough, and I was glad when we moved.

    I don't know what the answer is, but this is definitely a big problem and the effects on folks are long term.
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