You'd think seeing your family after being away for 3 months would make you want to stick around, but nope. Mine does the opposite. Seeing how happy they all are and how I don't fit in anywhere just proves that I have no reason to stay. I'm supposed to be the smart one and the nice one but I'm the only one who is still alone, completely broke, have no idea what I'm going to do and still live with my mom. I knew I was going to hate going because it's the same thing every time. I get to see my cousin with his fiance, my other cousin with his gf, and my younger sister with her bf (even my much younger cousin is discussing her bf with my sister). They all have their own cars and some have their own houses. At least this time I didn't get asked if I had a gf yet. They finally realized that I don't and won't and to just stop asking cause it's the same response every time. This is going to sound stupid and really arrogant but the fact that my two male cousins and my sister have the self absorbed personality is what makes things so bad. They always think of themselves first and have always been cocky about there athletics and looks and yet they are the ones that are happy and actually have a life. I actually think about others and do things to help others (it makes me feel a little good) and I'm the one stuck with nothing. Guess it just proves that in life these days you have to think only about yourself first. I just don't fit in anywhere. I spend all this money and time in school and I never get to use any of it. Every time I try to talk about what I've learned I get told to stop cause it's gross (I'm in zoology so a lot of dissecting and internal anatomy) or I just get blank stares cause no one has a clue what I'm talking about. I already think that University is a waste of time and then to never have any chance to show what I'm learning just amplifies the uselessness.