Did

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ema

Antiquities Friend
#1
Just wondering if there is anybody else here with DID.

I'm used to not having others like us around, but it would be interesting to talk to others. We were on a DID forum once, but it just disappeared.
 

ema

Antiquities Friend
#3
Nice to meet you, plates.

Yes, I do have a therapist. He is very good with DID and I've been with him for about 9 years.
 

plates

Well-Known Member
#4
It's nice to meet you too. :smile:

Where did you find you therapist? I'm having a lot of trouble finding one who deals with DID rather than simple or complex PTSD.
 

ema

Antiquities Friend
#5
It is hard to find one, that's for sure. I was "fired" by a therapist because he didn't believe in DID and said I was being difficult.

I actually got to my doc through a maze. I was desperate and called a couples therapist we had seen before and asked for referals. She had picked up on my zoning out and was good friends with my doc and recommended him. He didn't know I had DID and neither did I. But, he figured it out quick and started talking to me about things that nobody had every known before and he just KNEW me. Turned out he was good with DID and willing to commit to me.

If you don't mind me asking, where are you? Maybe I could ask him if he knows somebody?
 

plates

Well-Known Member
#6
Your experiences sound similar to mine. I'm so sorry you had that with a therapist- some people really think they know it all don't they, and want you to not think for yourself?

How you found one, is similar to what I've been doing, talking to therapists and asking them if they know any specialists. Thing is when I've searched there appears to be only ONE therapist who has a lot of experience in DID and he lives quite a distance from me. It's taken me years to figure out the extent of PTSD I have, and one of the main things that makes me sure- is because I'm losing a lot less time than years before; I'm becoming more consciously aware of the splits in me and I'm so much more aware of how I work. What I do know is, when the young central core of me is suffering I struggle tremendously.

I'm in London.
 

ema

Antiquities Friend
#7
Sorry I haven't posted. Sometimes I get all mixed up around here.

When my core hurts, we really struggle, too. I've been having a really hard time lately. But, we're supposed to be putting things away for now so that we can finish school. It's not working. I rarely work on school anymore and I'm going to be in real trouble soon.

Maybe a regular therapist would be willing to work with you, learn about DID and help you. I don't know. Sometimes they will. But, it is a big committment on their part.
 

plates

Well-Known Member
#8
Do you find when you don't deal with things/put them away it can mean a major blow up in the near future? I'm really sorry to hear you all are having a difficult time- I'm not sure if you've ever tried journalling, but that can help contain feelings in the present moment. Do you get support at school re: extra time for any projects?
 
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ema

Antiquities Friend
#9
I have gotten extra time at school, and I had a declared disability at work.

I don't like to write things down because I don't want them to be found. I do some writing in the diary feature here, though.

As for putting things away, yeah, if I don't deal with them they can come back and get me. But, I'm learning ways to put them away that makes them less likely. Right now I have to not deal with past stuff as I can hardly deal with current stuff.

Thanks for caring.
 

TBear

Antiquities Friend
#10
My therapist didn't treat trauma usually at all - but we had gotten so far in the "therapeutic relationship" as far as trust went, when he (and eventually I) realized I had DID....

Well, we even did some "bibliotherapy" so that he was learning about it with me - we covered a chapter or two every week for a while....

Good Luck - Take care.... What Plates said has been true for me as well - it took time for me to become aware of the pieces I was in... and when the little ones are struggling - boy does that send me into a tailspin! But with time, the system has been coming together, everytime I can incorporate a traumatic memory into actual memory, a little more of me is accepted and becomes more real.... Makes me feel scattered at times, confused , yes, I loose time and sometimes end up places I don't want to be.... That is the result of the damage that was done to me...

There are 13 of me, and that is the way I survived the unsurvivable!

:hug: Journaling was and is the best thing I have ever done for myself - it has helped the different voices be heard and recognized... and has become a way to communicate with myself and even with my therapist, I bring the journal to session and he reads it aloud in session so that hopefully all of me hears...
 

ema

Antiquities Friend
#11
I had a terrible session today. My little ones don't seem able to communicate well right now and the doc was obviously frustrated. We're all just having a difficult time right now and nobody seems to get that.

Yesterday, we lost many hours and have no idea what happenned. We haven't done that in a long time.

Today, the doc didn't seem to get who was there and it only made things worse and now we just feel lost and confused. He doesn't usually make that mistake. Just a bad session, I guess.
 

TBear

Antiquities Friend
#12
I've had a few of those and ended up driving out of the state and not remembering ... only lost an hour or so - but it was awful...

Can you call someone like an anchor of sorts to ground you - I put my therapist on my fast dial so that even the littlest part of me could dial and get all of me grounded.

Another method we used for some time was to get a small item that reminded me of the present - or some point of safety, like the therapist, and keep it in my pocket.

Take care... :hug: ( I bought a baby blanket and stuffed toy for each little one - so my bed got a little crowded - but each has her stuff and I feel cuddled in and safe...)
 
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