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Difficult to let go

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So I've been in hospital recently and came out after 4 weeks. I've been trying to get better but it's difficult to let go of the whole idea of suicide. If I get better then I'm letting go of the chance to commit suicide, which still feels like the right thing to do.

I just feel like I'm making up crisis after crisis so that I can get put back into hospital.
Or maybe I'm really relapsing.


Well-Known Member
You will always have the choice for suicide. Even if you are totally happy and content, the choice will always be there, but you will hopefully get to a point where suicide is a choice you don't want to make.

If suicide feels like the right thing to do, why do you keep 'making up crisis after crisis so that I can get put back into hospital'. What it really sounds like is that your illness is making you want to commit suicide, however, deep down, what you really want is help, and to be better.

Do you have support now that you have come out of hospital? Have you told them how you feel? Could you show them this post? It is common for people to be scared of getting better, but remember that it will not be instant, it will happen gradually, and slowly, and it will come step by step when you are ready for it.

Try and be honest with those that are supposed to be helping you.

Hang in there and keep fighting
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