Well all, as you may know, I created this account because I was completely and utterly depressed because my friend committed suicide, and wouldnt you know it..the love of my life, the one who I loved for 3 years, the one who I thought was my soul mate, told me two days...TWO DAYS after my friend committed suicide that she was in love with someone else. This triggered something in my head. I was getting through the pain of this with Diphenhydramine..The Benedryl pills would take me away from it all. It would make me feel nothing at the time. But there would be times where I would hallucinate. My habit got so bad, I would order bottles of 1,000 pills off the internet and they would last me 3 weeks. I would resort to stealing them from the store until finally i got caught one time and I wasnt allowed to come in to the store anymore.. Finally I snapped myself out of it when I got evicted out of that hell I was in. That became the turning point of my using...I will admit, I did con my dad into buying me some when I first moved back to his house...I said I had "allergies" but I started seeing a Psychiatrist whom I told everything to and I havent touched it for 11 months...almost a year now.