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Diseased by the one I love

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by littlerunnaway22, Oct 24, 2011.

  1. When I fell in love with an old childhood friend I fell hard. He was so wonderful, and gentle and sweet. We've been dating for about a year, and he recently asked me to marry him. Sounds great right? What the heck is she doing here, right?
    Well, I recently noticed a change in my body that left me frazzled, so i went to the doctor to get checked out. He gave me gential warts. HE GSVE ME GENITAL WARTS!
    This may not seem like the end of the world to most of you, but I have worked very hard to stay disease free my entire life. And we were cautious until he asked me to marry him, not because I knew he was infected, but because that is just how I am. Now I feel decieved.
    He does not show any signs of having this problem, or there would have been some serious red flags from the get go.

    So, now I have the diagnosis. I came home and told him right away. I believe in honesty and trust. He didn't say anything.... not one word. I have cried and cried and cried, and still not one word.
    Now I can see them forming on my lips, not just my genitals. I"M GOING TO HAVE THEM ON MY FACE! And he won't even say anything about it.

    I don't want to walk through this world with evidence of this obvious deception on my face. And what's worse, he won't touch me, or even come near me. I guess I don't blame him, I wouldn't want to touch me either.

    *sigh* resigned to my fate
  2. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    That sounds horrible, Is it possible he has had the same thing done to him? perhaps he didnt know.
    I dont want it to sound like im defending him but like you said he didnt show any signs so he may have not known.
    Some people are carriers,,
    Is there anything they can do before they get bad? any medication exc?

    its a good thing he hasnt touched you but he needs to get treatment aswell or it will just keep coming back.
    if he refuses or is still giving you the silent treatment perhaps you need to reconsider the marrage thing.
    You need some proof he cares about you.
  3. LightInTheDarkestNight

    LightInTheDarkestNight Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry if he gave you HPV, he very well may not have known he had it. Some people are only carriers and in some it can also take even years for the symptoms to show up or even be noticed. Although generally symptoms show up in 1-3 months, however some of them can be very minor and only noticeable if you examine yourself with a fine tooth comb.

    I didn't think one could get Genital Warts on your face so I looked it up and this doctor agrees if you do have something on your face it must be something else. If they are indeed warts on your face I feel they must be a different kind then the genital type.


    I suggest getting an appointment with your doctor ASAP to address your concerns. There is a supplement called DIM which can help your body fight off the HPV infection, either getting rid of it or keeping it in a dormant state(so the warts don't come back once you get rid of them). You want to have the strongest possible immune system and your body can get rid of them on it's own and there are many tools in a doctors arsenal to help this process as well.

    Even though you may have warts now it probably wouldn't hurt to look into getting the vaccine for HPV.

    That isn't right the way you're boyfriend is treating you he needs to be more caring, understanding and compassionate towards you. It's very possible he feels guilty over the situation or he just doesn't want to address it in a sense a form of denial.
  4. LightInTheDarkestNight

    LightInTheDarkestNight Well-Known Member

    Actually if they both have the same strain aka she got hers from him I don't think they will keep infecting each other so to speak. In that sense I don't see any reason for them not to be touching each other.

    It's my understanding HPV is kinda like herpes in that sense once you have it you have it and can't get reinfected. yes you can get treatment for it freezing, creams etc or they can go away on their own and never come back if your immune system keeps them dormant or gets rid of them.
  5. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    I am so very sorry. :(
    I think I may have them too from a guy- though I've never had actual sex.
  6. I didn't expect to get any answers on this. I thought everyone here would think I was being childish- It feels that way. I appreciate your responses. And I must say, frankly, I thought the responses would be more bleak. I guess is just fells better to have someone know, even if you'll never know me.

    Things are not better, in fact they are worse. I know that doc said that they don't form on your face, but there is something seriously wrong there. It hasn't gotten worse, but I'm afraid of what they will turn out to be.

    I have done some research on this as far as prognosis and treatment. It seems promising, I guess. Just wish I could go back to when he finally talked me into being with him and telling him no, like I had so many times before.

    His ex is a friend of mine, at least she was. Life is full of complications you know. Anyway, I called her and talked to her about this. She told me that she got them and called him. Months and Months ago. She said that she didn't think it was something I should hear from his ex. GOD, I wish she had called me.

    Thank you so much for being my place to vent. It's almost as if everything is clearer when I have to type it out. The bottom line is, I may be normal now, but it is temorary. And for the rest of my life, I will have to carry this with me, along with everything else I've decided should go in that category. Now, the a fact that I am worse than everyone around my will be in the form of a physical problem.

    Revelations 21:4
    And he shall wipe away all tears...
  7. Butterfly

    Butterfly Sim Addict Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    I'm sorry to hear about this. They are very treatable. If you haven't already done so I would get a full STD check and a blood test done to check for HIV, Hepatitis etc. This is not to worry you it is just to be on the safe side to ensure that your immune system isn't compromised in anyway. The warts on your face could just be a complete coincidence. I wouldn't be mad with your partner it sounds like he didn't know, even though his ex did tell him about it. If he is the carrier he would not have known.