Dissociative Fugue

[yeh.]

has anybody in here been through a dissociative fugue, just wonderin. cause is weird and i don't know who i am anymore. so i'm takin pills. i think i could die, then again i really don't know. it seems lazy. i just don't know how to talk with people anymore. they are all so far away now. im going through a emotional amnesia or a sumethin and i dont' know what to do. i doubt i can get any help. who could get it. it's all so weird. even typin this-i just want to know what carried me to this state. is it a good thing to be just 'born'. like suddenly you just fell to earth but you'r not that young. i like being alone. feel like i killed myself and i might just finish the job. i don't know. im just a being. i think i would go in a relatively calm state. i may have schizophrenia. i don't know. sweet resting lord of the ever changing thought. cheers

 

[yeh.]

just..what to do when you are expected to behave in some ways and somehow you just can't anymore. who i am. is it possible to die in dreams or exchange oneself persona for the dreams and viceversa? what to do. btw don't mean anythin by lazy, blo. just don't know how to put the feelin in words or sumethin- just in case. wouldn't describe wanting to just not be as that. then again i don't know how to feel/speak lately. yeh. help

 

[yeh.]

well, this blows. moderators please delete my posts asap. i want to vanish. g'bye all. u wake up and the first thought i have is that of ending it. it's scary i don't really want to, but i don't see where i could go to feel ok. what the hell's wrong with this. complex story filled with self deception. where to go when you have betrayed hell, then went to heaven and betrayed heaven as well, so nor heaven or hell wants you now

 

[yeh.]

sry

i'm sorry for being such. im not helpin anybody in here amd god know i can't hide how i feel. so i'd just like to have my post removed at any chance given..yeh. i don't expect advice or sumethin. my way aof approach might be not the most usual, bur i just forgot how to do so. thks anyhow

 

[Wonderstuff]

Re: sry

I'm sorry, I can't give you any advice because I've never experienced a dissociative fugue.
I don't want to delete your posts though...
If you just need someone to listen I'm here, but I'm sorry I can't advise you.
Please stick around...
Take care and please stay safe,

Lauren

 

[letdown]

i have experienced something familiar. do you think your medication has anything to do with it? this dissociation? i was dissociating a lot when i tried some new pills. take care of yourself.

 

[yeh.]

it's hard to explain. the thing is i find it hard to cope or relate now. as i'm not sure who i am now. the ones that i used to kno' may expect me to behave in a way that i have forgot. i hate my being. why did i do this to myself? should i just go
thank you lauren & letdown. i'd like to know how did you cope with the feelings. stay safe you too. i appreciate the replies. wish i could just travel away and start a new life once again, then again that was the issue i guess. heaven knows- cheers

 

[letdown]

yeh,
i think before you edited you mentioned you were having a stressful life. when i was dissociating i was under a great amount of stress too-and still am.

if you can pinpoint where your stresses are coming from this may be helpful in easing some of these feelings. is anything stressing you at the moment that you haven't mentioned already?

i am in a similar position and i don't think you should go. have you told anybody near you about how you can't be the person you are supposed to be because of your symptoms? i find in talking about things and letting people know - it may ease a lot of isolation you may be feeling right now. do you have any close friends/family you can tell and who you could be around at the moment?

what do you think you did to yourself? these symptoms aren't your fault.

 

[Wonderstuff]

One thing about not knowing who you are - while it may be difficult to know what to do because you don't know how you 'should' react to things, based on who you are...you get to find out who you are by how you react.
Sorry, that sounded cryptic.
Ummm, I mean that if you say "I'm a Christian", then you might feel you should be disgusted by gay people, because the Bible says it's wrong. However, if you don't know what you believe, you can just say, "You know, I'm not completely at ease with gay people, but I think it's a valid lifestyle choice." Do you get what I mean? You get to just do what comes naturally, rather than what you think you *should* do. Or what other people think you should do, I guess, come to that.
Hopefully that wasn't *too* confusing... :shy:
One other thing: You started a new life before? How did that come about?

 

[SteakAndChips]

Hey - I have never suffered from this - but am here if you need someone to talk to

xx

 

[yeh.]

thank you all. moonstar i think you'r right about just acting as it comes. goin with the flow. the fugue is a rather confussin one. but yeh i feel isolated and with no energy to look forward basically. i change too fast. i feel i can't tell to anybody with paradox. i appreciate the insights. hmm left two lifes now. being third seems to be kinda lonely. now' rainin and i ran out. pill pill doc pill. yeh

 

[yeh.]

well i don't kow what happened- would't be good if we had as time machine or a button when you know that you could just go and restart again? like ok god i screwed up, i didn't knew what i had and that stuff. now this is just too much. so much for a brain. is just so much. and everyone's left- it's funny when the suicidal feelings stays there..always there...always. and is something just..just so stupid IMO-

 

[Frayed]

If it makes you feel any better, my sister had a dissociative fugue when she was a teenager. She got into a fight with my mother and the next thing we knew, she was in Kansas City staying in a hotel (about 300 miles away). She dissociated while driving and just kept driving because she couldn't remember who she was or where she was going. She ended up going to a hotel and the police were able to match her up to the missing persons report.

Hypnotherapy helped her regain the memory from the fugue. The docs said people have to be relaxed in order to reintegrate. That's why the hypnotherapy helped- it removed the anxiety even if briefly. Maybe some self-hypnotherapy techniques would help you when you feel confused?