New here. I have chosen my method. I just need to buy the stuff. I know where I can get it and it's a pretty failsafe method from what I can see on the Internet. I could get the stuff and do it by the end of the weekend. I suppose I'm posting on here because a part of me wants to be talked out of it. I went to A and E with my mum earlier in the week because things were so awful. I didn't get any help because I was staying with mum and I don't live in her area. I couldn't say too much about being suicidal with my mum there. I came home - I live in Scotland and mum's in England - and promised my mum I'd get help. I haven't, I've just researched how to kill myself and decided on a method. There is a crisis line I could call. I'm scared of doing it. I don't know what to say. I don't know if they'll take me seriously. I don't know if it's worth trying any more. I don't think things will get better for myself, I have had depression for many years and haven't been in a relationship for 8 years, but my mum doesn't deserve for me to die - it would hurt her too much. Problem is I don't know if I can stop myself killing myself - I feel kind of cold and dead like nothing else matters except getting the stuff and doing it.