Okay... this is embarrassing to talk about... but it's really REALLY beginning to bother me a lot. I don't smoke or do drugs, and never intend on starting. I drink once a year or less and have never been drunk- it just doesn't interest me. The only way that I know I've been able to relieve my daily stress in the past was through sex. My only boyfriend ever- agreed to wait until I was ready to have sex the first time... and it was nearly 2 years that we waited before doing it. After that though, we were doing it at least once a day- every day- for the rest of our 7 year relationship. I have only ever had sex with him. I have not even been sexually attracted to a single other person in my whole life. The average was 3 times a day... sometimes up to 6 or 7- every day... I would be late for school and work and appointments because I'd want to do it before I left the house (or before bed... or while making dinner... or in the morning...). I feel kind of bad now because there were times that he would refuse at first and I would kinda ignore him and keep going... -__- there were also a few times that he would say it was getting painful, and I would kinda ignore him. >.< ahh! I'm a horrible person!! I'd also molest him in his sleep sometimes XD For the most part he'd have no problem, and would (enthusiastically) initiate it just as often as I did. (a bit less...) I guess that it gave me enough confidence and happiness to last the period that I would be in public and on buses and in crowds... so I wouldn't get so shaky and anxious? Now I've gone from doing it every day to NEVER. I can't seem to do much on my own... so my stress keeps building. -__- I've thought of having one night stands, but I am pretty shy at first- kinda paranoid- and really distrusting of people. It takes a long time for me to feel comfortable with people and I can't imagine ever getting naked with someone who I'm not comfortable with! 0_o I've also considered adding 'benefits' to a friendship with one of my guyfriends who is currently single... but I honestly can't see myself being able to do that either. I'd be afraid of hurting his feelings in the longrun. (and I'm still only attracted to my ex... urg.) I know that I need to find another way to take out my daily stress... any suggestions? (I already do yoga/pilates, paint, hot showers, write and so on) I was wondering if anyone else has this problem? Also... am I normal? Should I seek help for this?