Do I want to die? Not really. But what I WANT is a life worth living and it seems, especially right now at 3 am on a Saturday night that it isn't. I haven't had a single girlfriend in my life. I'm 22. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME? I haven't even had sex. This is going to make it even harder and more awkward to attain one. I got fired from my job a few months ago, and now I am down to making min. wage and despite multiple job interviews, I have yet to get a new job. I have asked many girls out before. Every one has turned me down. Imagine from when your just 17 all the way to 22... every girl you've ever liked. I had given up recently but I met this wonderful girl named Elizabeth who made me feel terrific. We had so much in common but when I asked her out she said "I don't feel for you in THAT way." WhAT THE!?! I've heard that before and all I can figure it means is I'm UGLY. So that must be why I can't get a girlfriend. I'm ugly. UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY UGLY.... and no matter how GOOD OF A PERSOn I may be nobody is ever going to want me. And I don't care what I do in life if I have no one to share it with. A.K.A. --> I don't care if I LIVE. I asked another girl out tonight even after that recent one and she said no too. So that means over fifty girls now have turned me down in a row. What's the point? Besides that, I almost have no friends anymore. I find myself waking up with no one to talk to... eating lunch with nobody... going to town, supermarket, stores, everywhere I go is just me by myself. It makes me so lonely. All i want is more friends, a girlfriend and a nice job. why doesn't it happen. why am i so unlucky as to be like this. without friends and people who care about you there is nothing. it's not just that. i'm ashamed of myself. i can't even talk to people i used to be friends with online because they may ask what i've been up to and what do i say? working at mcdonalds and living with my parents while single and alone!!??! Yeah, how's your stupid marriage and nice house you just bought!! My family isn't very big and they are the one thing that is still good in my life. But that alone may not save me. I don't think I'm gonna make it much longer. Eventually I'm gonna give up.