do people in real life know about SF?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by justmeonlyme, May 1, 2015.


do people in real life know about SF

  1. No

    29 vote(s)
  2. No, but they know about some of the issues that relate to why I'm on here

    23 vote(s)
  3. Yes

    11 vote(s)
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  1. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    I'm just wondering if people who you know in real life know you come on SF, particularly those close to you.
    this is something i have thought a lot about, no one knows i come on here.
    the reason i ask is I'm considering if i should tell my partner as we have been together for quite sometime now and the long we are together the more time we spend together and the harder it is becoming to hide SF from him. he is aware of the issues i have surrounding the reasons i am a member here but doesn't know about the site.
    so i was just wondering if others had told people close to them. and if no why not and if yes then why and also if yes then how did they take it? how did you bring it up? etc
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2015
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Yeah all my family know basically because I donated through my brothers visa about a year ago and then again a while later. Once they knew it was a support site they didn't even mention it and encouraged me to use SF. They think it is good for me, which it is :) After many suicide attempts a forum doesn't bother them.

    In your case just bring it up lightly, say you found a nice supportive community on the internet and leave it at that, i'm sure he will understand :)
  3. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    My family knows I do. Though I suspect most prefer to keep it to themselves, I "why" really depends on the person. If family were a big source of stress and one of the issues they need to talk about obviously they would not want the family to read it. Also, if it was to make it so you are no longer comfortable to say whatever you felt need saying for fear of somebody reading it would not be as useful to many. I do think if you mention or they notice it is important to explain the what type of site it is. This is certainly not the type of site I was looking for when googling "suicide methods" and if you say i am a member of a suicide forum and leave it at that it is apt to be a negative response based on what most people think that would be.
  4. Cicada 3301

    Cicada 3301 Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Some of my friends found out one time. I spent 13 hours waiting to see someone in the hospital and after that i just went home. next day police came to my home. My family don't know.
  5. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Some know. But for those who know, I make sure to tell them its thoughts and desires. But I will never take the action to do it myself. Just a longing and craving to be released. Most people could not handle hearing this. So very few have been told.
  6. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Seeing is Believing Forum Pro SF Supporter

    No and don't intend to share where I've been up to
  7. Flying Fox

    Flying Fox SF Supporter

    I've told my mum, therapist and psychiatrist about this website and how it has been helping me cope. I've also told them that it has many others who are also coping with disorders and anxiety.

    My first therapist (same one who made things very difficult for us by telling the hospital I wasn't stable - when I actually was) actually told me that it was not a good idea to come here, which is total bull in my books. She never really helped me, and made things worse for us. Not all therapists know what they are talking about, not all doctors either. They x-rayed the wrong arm; as a result I was cleared for weight-bearing too early and so they had to re-break my arm to straighten it.
  8. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Only a few people in real life know this site even exists. Most of the time, if I'm visiting someone or have people staying here, I don't log in, or I make sure I'm behind a closed door when I do.
  9. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    hey thanks guys your comments have given me a bit more to think about. i am still yet to tell my partner. I'm not even really sure how to bring the topic up. makes it harder that though he knows about some of my issues i don't think he is aware of the extent of how bad things got so not aware that i got to the point of wanting to end my life.
  10. fosty

    fosty Well-Known Member

    haven't told anyone, even though i'm known as a chronic depressive, I haven't taken the final leap and told them. Guess I'm a bit ashamed still. it's like the last taboo
  11. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Only my mom knows and she doesn't care. My therapist knows I'm on a site but he doesn't know the entire story. Haven't really felt the need to tell anyone else.
  12. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    The only one that ever knew IRL was a therapist I once had. That was about 7 years ago. She has not been a part of my life for over 6 years now duo I can honestly say no-one knows. I am careful to clear search history and such on my phone so if something ever did happen it won't be found out. People just wouldn't understand here.
  13. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN SF Author

    Several of my friends know - and even people from work know about the site. I used to be embarrassed I guess, but apart from my parents (who do not understand the concept of 'online' in any way) I have no issues about people knowing. I understand that it is different in different places, and for different people, but for me I do not want to have any part in perpetuating the idea that mental illness is something to be ashamed of, so I talk about it.
  14. AAA3330

    AAA3330 Well-Known Member

    I've told several people that I get on a suicide forum. I just don't really care what other people think. I hurt too much to feel emarassed about it.
  15. Jae

    Jae Well-Known Member

    I told my mama last year..I want to slowly tell her everything about this site and about my thoughts but she looks uninterested so I stopped... :) she didn't hear what I'm about to say.
  16. Aphorism

    Aphorism Well-Known Member

    I've mentioned it to various friends, though I don't use the site consistently.
  17. del lago

    del lago Member

    No, they don't know, and I kind of intend to keep it that way.
  18. insiiideouuut

    insiiideouuut Well-Known Member

    Hell no but my parents are always up in my shit so it wouldn't shock me if they found it somehow.
  19. Jackie's Strength

    Jackie's Strength Staff Alumni

    I picked the second option, though there is one person - my therapist - who knows I log-on to a suicide support forum every now and then. I mentioned to my parents and sister years ago that I logged onto a support site for people experiencing similar challenges - but it's not something I regularly talk about, and I have never mentioned the exact name of the forum, even when asked by my therapist. I want to feel as safe as possible to express my thoughts and feelings here, and that would be compromised if someone had the ability to read my posts.
  20. GreyCat

    GreyCat Well-Known Member

    No. This is the only place where my depression is acknowledged.
    Katryn likes this.
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