do we want to know why a member isnt here anymore?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by IV2010, Nov 14, 2010.

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  1. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I was wondering what is the correct thing to do when one leaves the forum due to death?
    Is it appropriate for someone to come here and tell us they've gone or is it going to trigger and better left not said and the person fades from everyones memories.
    I personally would like to know if someones 'gone' so that I know one way or the other that most of those we don't see again are ok and have moved on...
    and I'd like some closure
    what do others think and what is the etiquette here?
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 14, 2010
  2. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    How can we ever actually know if someone has died unless two people keep in contact by other methods than on here. I know what you are saying. Perhaps as of the type of forum it is, it is best not to advertise the fact that people have died and is meant to be pro-life. I suppose some people come on here and like the fact it's anomynous and use it in times of crisis but then go away for a while.
  3. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    I would prefer to know. Bit wierd but if i new them it would give a chance to say goodbye, in my own way. Otherwise i would always wonder and it would bug me. It does make me feel very sad.
  4. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    I would prefer to know
  5. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    I would prefer to know. I usually remember people I knew over the net, and wonder what ever happened to them. Like how they are going in life and stuff. This actually reminds me of a friend that was moved down to Tasmania by child services and now I don't know where she is :unsure:.
  6. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    This is exactly why we try not to advertise it, but members do post in the Loved and Lost section. We do ask people to contact staff first so we can decide how to handle the situation.
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I would prefer to not know. I've seen the pain and suffering members deaths have caused other members(who were already suffering prior to this) and I believe it's best left unknown.

    Some are posted in the loved and lost section but its usually left at the discretion of the admins to decide what to do and what should be posted.
  8. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    I would like to be told, personally, but I can definitely, 100% understand not wanting to hear about it.

    Tough, either way... not a good situation.
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