do you ever feel judged?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by the masked depressant, May 7, 2011.

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  1. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    i certainly do, and i'm sick of it.

    i just want to talk to someone who will not judge me..

    bbut that's not the point.. my question is when you tell someone about your feelings etc, have you ever been judged?. been told you are weak, or stupid or anything like that.

    how do you deal with it
  2. Riley

    Riley Member

    The only person in the entire world who knows what you are going through is you. Try and ignore when they judge.
  3. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    oh yes! 2 days after i watched my OH rot in front of my eyes and die, i collapsed and my sister told those around "i have had enough of this i will be glad when its all over" made me feel wrong for giving in to exhaustion, the fact he died so horribly...i just shut down. spent several days in hospital on drip..people judge you because they have no idea of how you feel, they are cold, they maybe self absorbed, or just dorks...i used to get would rather feel like i feel than like they feel, but i still feel judged if you get what i mean.
  4. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    most of the time.
  5. MLKane

    MLKane Well-Known Member

    It's so annoying. Every time I told someone I was just depressed they told me I had nothing to be depressed over, that I was so stupid, I was so inconsiderate, I was so weak, look at the problems that the rest of the world faces, aren't they so much bigger than yours. are you starving? no? well there are children in africa who are staving and they don't want to kill themselves. have you lost a parent? no? well ........ lost his/her mother/father and they don't want to kill themselves. you have such a good life, you have so much to live for, you're so smart, you're a nice guy, why would you want to kill yourself? I just shrug and drop the subject, if they don't want to listen then I don't want to talk.

    but it hurts you, it took me months to work up the balls to tell my current best friend, and I was so terrified he would think I was a freak and tell me to get lost that I didn't really tell him anything, just the basic "I'm depressed, self harming and suicidal" and left it at that. and he's the first person not to judge, not to try and rationalise, he just said if I was ever in trouble he was just a phone call away. it was the greatest release ever. and thats the point, you've just gotta keep on trying, because the one who does get it makes up for all the ones who didn't.
  6. Urza

    Urza Active Member

    All the time.

    I'm 'mentally disabled' and so I live in government aids and there's a huge stigma towards mentally disabled people very similar to people afflicted with leprosy during the Middle Ages.

    I find myself viciously defending and then attacking when explaining my disability.

    Do I really believe I'm disabled? Of course not, I believe that I'm just different, not 'special' mind you but different as in how the rest of society runs.

    To cope I write a journal, it helps to 'get it all out' in a way that you won't be judged by others.

  7. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    i write a journal also- i'm on a site called livejournal

    really helps
  8. Urza

    Urza Active Member

    I also write on Livejournal though it's not my personal journal, I use it as my 'Too Controversial for Facebook' political/social/religious/economic commentary so basically everything. :)

    As far as a personal journal I write those in a composition notebook and been doing so for three years now.

    It really does help.

  9. calypsoissick

    calypsoissick Active Member

    All the time I get judged and all that jazz. But the only way to solve it is to educate people and reverse the Demonetization of mental illness.
  10. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    easier said than done- so many people just arn't interested

    it makes me sick
  11. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    do you write in it every day?

    i used to write in it every day, and if i didon't do it- i'd get angry with myself

    but just of late- i've not really had motivation to write to my journal, and i've gone down to maybe once a week if that.

    i just finished writing in it now- but only because i promised a friend i'd send him something. not because i actually felt inclined to do it
  12. sunshinesblack

    sunshinesblack Well-Known Member

    this is a really depressing subject for me
    I still dont know how to get past the stigma and the situations my parents forced me in
    I deeply feel its to late for me and learned the hard way my instinct is very reality relevant
  13. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    Yes and yes again...the other day I went shopping for shoes, and the sales people ignored me completely until i went up to them and ask to try on a pair of shoes...I get ignored all the time at stores, most of the time it doesn't bother me, but yesterday it made me want to never go outside again...i felt judged and that somehow i was not worthy of going out in public...i guess maybe it was an overreaction on my part but its what i felt...if i could i would never go out anymore... just whole myself away and let the world do its thing and me do my thing...i really wish i could shut the world out then maybe i wouldnt feel so shitty all the time.
  14. Illusion

    Illusion Well-Known Member

    I feel judged all the time cause I'm so friggen' different. The list could go on & on. How do I deal with it you ask? I have no clue. I guess I try to occupy myself with stuff I like & isolate myself from everybody when I can.
  15. Urza

    Urza Active Member

    I usually don't write in it everyday because I get distracted with the internet or gaming.

    I also get angry with myself if I don't write in it for a while, for me it's a personal and historic record in addition to being my best non-judgemental friend.

    The entry that you wrote your friend? Did you censor it?

    Write your journals for you, no one else, you'll feel better. :)

  16. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    I'd judge others if I was on a jury - but thankfully I've never judged people over mental or physical disabilities. I tend to 'judge' people I get to know - as we all do in a moral sense. For instance if a workmate I was getting on with confessed to cheating on his wife I'd judge him to an extent.

    I also judge people who judge others, especially those who bully others. That said, I can forgive those who tried it on with me - I feel sorry for those whose lives are so sad that the only excitement they get is to cause discord in situations, environments or to other people.

    As for stigma - don't feel that way myself really. Anyone could get depression and its not a sign of your own weakness.

    Thing is - the human body is subject to all manner of illness and conditions that 'just happen' or are caused by a myriad of causes none of which are our fault. Of all these conditions, any that emanate from the the brain and affect the process of thought are perhaps the most difficult to deal with.

    Anyhow, those stupid, ignorant or dumb enough to judge you do not matter.

    Those who do matter to you don't judge.

    I am optimistic that the younger people now who suffer from depression will one day be the people who hold power and who can make a difference to how this illness is seen and defined.

    Keep some faith in yourself.
  17. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    yes, of course..

    they were just curious on how live journal worked, and asked me to write an entry for them- just to see the setup etc

    usually i write for myself though, it's a very personal thing some of the stuff said
  18. DawnB

    DawnB Well-Known Member

    Oh man, I hate it when people say that other people have it worse off. We all know this and that is not the point. But anyone who say this in my opinions are just brushing off your depression.
  19. DawnB

    DawnB Well-Known Member

    I get judged all of the time. Mostly because, if something bad happens with me, I will be told that it's my fault because I'm not assertive enough, or I didn't try hard enough and should've done this.
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