Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by ThornThatNeverHeals, Jul 29, 2011.
Or am i just alone when i feel this?
Amen my friend.... Amen
I voted for "only around certain people", and by that I am referring to when people are outlandishly rude to others (when they have a bad day, for example, and put a lot of stress onto others (whether it be on purpose or not)). That's very, very rare though and I think my tolerance is acceptable.
I voted Sometimes cause sometimes I'll get that feeling that I don't belong here. Like I'm to young to be on here & others have had it a lot worse than me here. Then I think about my mentality and all that I've been through and realize I need this site & it helps me so therefore I'll say to myself "I do belong". I don't go in Chat though. Never have. I can't strike up a conversation with random people. I have to befriend them or meet them somewhere else in order to strike a conversation with them & usually when I do that I want it to be just me and them mainly.
Basically what miranda said. These days I mainly hide in the members diary area lol. I don't look at any of the threads in other areas because I'm scared it's gonna trigger me, and I have enough things in my life that do that for no reason. I've never really liked instant messaging programs/things because I'm not that good with having to think of something to say. It's easier for me to write a message than to make a 4 second reply, i can edit it and make changes, I can't do that well enough in a chat room.
plus the text ends up moving to fast because everyone is saying something and I end up hitting enter and making myself look like an idiot :|
I put other as rarely feel like i don't belong but i do when i am having a really bad day and it's more me than anyone else. I sit in the room but don't really talk to anyone.
Most of The Time.
According to this poll, it's not just me, and I also have heard something of this kind more than a few times. Most people only talk to who they already know, and more than that, some are even downright selfish, inconsiderate. Sometimes being on this forum makes me feel even more worthless, invisible, and hurt.
In chat room, at times you'll find some really nice, understanding, generous male members but the truth is they are only trying to hit on depressed girls.
I'm done with bullshit in real life. So I have learned to be on the safe side here to avoid more bullshit. Sometimes, I even told myself that it is just impossible to expect anything from other miserable people.
Wow - I mean guys and girls - its a suicide forum! We have nothing to hide here and if you think about it - why actually worry about what others think here?
We're all kinda 'off the wall' in some way - we have depression and want to die sometimes so sure - you might be reluctant to chat with people or share - but its easy to reply to a post IF its not going to trigger you.
Think about finding a sponsor also - I have one myself and its a damned good idea, like a free therapist who emails me a couple of times a day - for support. I like the idea of 'my sponsor' - its cool - try it out.
Some of us are from the same countries also - its cheap to phone and sometimes free if you have some 'deal'.
We should be more friendly - you can make friends on here you know? I know its 'just the internet' but this is different! We're not just here to swap chat and talk about trivia - well, we can do that but most of us are here to 'connect' to other people - get to know each other a little and offer support.
We have meets also. I mean, I'd want to meet me! I'd meet myself and have a party - because, well, if I met myself I'd be tripping, right? lol. But you never know - maybe we could meet one day easily. Whoever is in the UK - if your feeling OK - maybe we will meet up for Christmas. It would be interesting for sure - and nobody would be feeling left out!
Anyhow - don't hide away - not here! You could make a nice comment to someone on the first post - or just drop a friend request to a random 'stranger' - I've done this and am emailing a few people - keeping in touch by PM.
Good luck - and I see you hiding!
I answered sometimes. I, like most others here, feel this way from time to time. It's part of who we are. Also, I'm older than most of the members on this forum so our interests are very different.
When I feel this way, I cut myself some slack and back off till it passes.
I stay out of chat because that is where the age difference really shows through.
You should come in chat love, its some good banter in there from all ages
its normaly in chat as everyone has made there groups and i remember wen people said hi wen u came in. nw they ignore u. they ignore plees for help. so unles u got a mod mate on there u may as well leave like i just did
Lots of differing opinions, I see. Very interesting poll
Okay, I'm not sure why you said this. I'm a male member and I go into chat sometimes.. I don't ever try to hit on depressed girls.. Is there any truth to this that lots or all of male members here are only there to hit on depressed girls? To date, I've never seen it happen in my time here. The moderators regulate the chat pretty well, and infractions are given out. I'd say it's run with little leeway for anything that crosses the line. If it ever does happen, I bet people report it because there is no room for that.
A bunch of people say "hi" when people come into chat, and a greeting is usually only missed if most people are AFK and/or text is flowing into chat too quickly (not everyone says "hi", but some do and very often too).
Also, let's say there is no one in Triggering Subjects (TS). If you go into TS after telling people in Main or Spare (room names) that you need someone to talk to since you need someone to listen, usually someone will go to TS and listen and talk you through what's on your mind. Not everyone has made their "groups." I know there are jerks here and there that are mean to others or passive-aggressive or just having a bad day. However, some in there are actually really friendly. Yes, there are the people who often offend others and are disliked by some or many, but I don't see cliques much if ever... People pop in and out of chat, there are regulars there, and that's all there is to it.. When I needed support, I got it back in late 2010. They were very helpful. Why would you need a mod mate to have a reason to stay in chat? Most of us are acquaintances on a web forum. You're welcome to come into chat with me and see if you are ignored. I don't think most people try to ignore others.
Anyways, that's my two cents, and I just didn't want there to be too much using accusations/claims (ones that I think can either be proven as unwarranted or strictly circumstantial) to persuade others from ever going into SF chat. It can often be a supportive place. All in all, we can agree to disagree.
P.S. There are some that don't ever outwardly show much if any care for others (on forums and in chat). Some have their reasons, whatever they may be, and I can respect that. Lots here are having a tough time and are overwhelmed at times. However, I don't think it's fair to badmouth the chat (or the forum) too much.
Disclaimer: I'm not trying to argue extensively with anyone. I don't know the posters I quoted. I just want to give credit where credit's due and I'm, to be honest, a little frustrated by the claims/accusations against chat. I can understand not liking being in chat for reasons other than the specified, but I have to be honest it's a little disconcerting reading the things I quoted. That's all. Sorry for posting a pretty darn long post. Just had to let it out after I saw the above. Chat frustrates me sometimes too, and I can understand the most about people seeming like they don't care. It's just... blah.
ye that was lengthy.... jeeeez and thanks for replying hun x i know your not trying to start anything and you just want everyone to get full support and feel welcome. and admitedly its not always liek how i describe it. just sometimes il go in n say hi. il get one hi back. its busy. so i just dismiss it, then someone whos constantly there arrives n they get the bigest welcome ever!!! il just need to make more appearances n get to know more people lol. cheers tho for the support x
Thanks for the reply, Angi. I understand what you mean about how some people get bigger welcomes. There is playing favorites and ignoring going on, you're definitely right. That's a pretty darn good point. Sometimes when I initially read posts, I get part of the picture but not all of it.
And yeah, that took forever to type and I'm sure there are things that you don't like about chat that are true and are too hard to put into words, almost like there being the X factor during ball games where no one knows how to explain how a player might influence a game a ton, but it is easy to see once you start playing the game. Sorry, I questioned whether I should have posted the above post, a lot more than I did any other post I have done on SF. :hugtackles: Chat definitely has its flaws, so in retrospect I was too positive about it. That post from someone else about how "All the guys seem nice but are only there to hit on depressed girls" just annoyed me beyond wits and got me into posting mode.
Anyhow, thanks for your input, and if you ever come into chat I'll be sure to say "Hi" and give people emoticon warnings if they are there and don't welcome you.
ye i can see how that would anoyy you. but it happened to me. only once tho and i never saw him again. maybe got kicked or banned or something.
and a nice greeting would be nice. thanks for understanding alex your a good guy x tc. im off to watch south park
Yikes! Well then, I'm glad now that I've ramped up the privacy on all social networking things and to not include SF people except for a separate Skype/MSN without my real name or info. I hope that person got banned for good.
Anyways, I digress. Hope you enjoy South Park.
P.S. I barely know you, but I will always remember that you were the only one who responded in a PM in my Buddy Chat thread when I was feeling down. So thank you for that. :hugtackles:
I answered most of the time. I just dont know, maybe its me and people dont like my attitude or maybe because im forthright, who knows.
Come on now, i gotta agree that chat sometimes seems like a dating site. If you want support im sorry but stay away from chat. People say can you speak to me or ask for someone to PM them and they get ignored half the time so they end up logging out. People sit in TS on their own sometimes for an hour before anyone checks to see if they are ok. People sit in TS and take it over and defeat the entire point of that room as well. As for cliques maybe some people are in a different chat room than me because thats all i can see when im in their and its been the same for a long time. These are just some of the things i have witnessed over the past few months since ive been back in their.
Then again ive seen the results of a SF type chat that is unmoderated and believe me you dont wanna ever see what thats like
Yes, I don’t fit in. I have tried so very hard to see through the eyes of humanity. I have never succeeded, the mask breaks down, people see through it, through the lies, they see I am not human, they see the monster beyond. Even I do not believe it anymore, the reflection is not me.
most of the time