Do you ever get the feeling that your therapist has given up on you?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Unknown_Entity_xO, Nov 17, 2010.

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  1. I'm really feeling that right now.

    Tried to be honest with him today, told him that I attempted again and he didn't say much, didn't seem phased, didn't really have anything to say.

    Bleh. Just feel kinda crappy, wondering if its just me that feels this way?
  2. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    Wow, that sounds awful because letting someone know something so important can be a huge risk. If a therapist reacted that way I'd get furious (in the past I bet I'd internalised) because I'd feel like my life had no worth to a professional who is supposed to save life.

    In my case, it wasn't a case of "given up" but of inadequacy: she could deal with me going there well but not unwell and said I was "letting myself down" by drinking to stop a suicide attempt :blink:. It took me a week to process the relationship after I'd hit a crisis, to let her know I wasn't coming back because I realised she couldn't deal with my flashbacks and wanted me grounded all the time. I'm sorry but flashbacks is why I go for therapy. When I talked to her about it before I left she refused to listen and didn't understand..

    It's not your fault your therapist is reacting this way.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 17, 2010
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    i often feel that way too especially when i know i have crashed again i think it comes to a point where we either get the coping skills that are taught to us or we don't and if we don't then itis not going to happen As you said the therapist just did not know what else to say or do. Not a great therapist then
  4. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    I always try to remember that therapists are people too, and therefore subject to having bad or 'off' days. But this excuse can only go so far. As plates said, you disclosed something very important, and your therapist should have reacted appropriately to that.

    If you feel comfortable to do so, I would raise this issue with him. He may be able to explain himself (although it's a bit late for that!) and at least he'll understand what he's done.

    I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience.

  5. Caster

    Caster Well-Known Member

    I feel for you. I had to cancel due to job interviews/jobs for my last 2 therapist appointments and I left a message for her to call me back about working something out, and she hasn't. I haven't seen her in 6 weeks now:(. I feel as though I haven't recovered like I should have according to her. I guess I'm just saying you're not alone in this. I've been waiting for her to return my call and am not sure what to do.

    Another thing is...many psychologists have never been in our shoes. It's easy for them to see us as weak. After having had the education I had, the best therapist for a person is one who is qualified AND has also experienced similar situations. Unfortunately, many have not had similar experiences.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 19, 2010
  6. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    Im sorry to hear youre having a tough time, and youre feeling your t is being unattentive. This may or may not be the case. When I was in therapy I recall having faced the same thing once. I received the same response (or lack thereof). Later after my head began to clear some I asked myself something. What did I expect from her (him in your case) to do? I went to her after the fact. I hadnt sought out her help when I actually needed it thus what did I expect? I accepted 'ok I let her know there is a problem'. I expressed myself. I accepted the next step was to talk about what led me to act out-the real source of why I did what I did in the 1st place. You know? I also considered was I expecting a reaction that family or friends might have? My t did eventually let me go. She came right out and said it. They know its not professional or in my best interest for there to be no closure. Id encourage you to take this up with him to remove potential uncertainties. Always better to assume nothing. Take care.
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