I don't think I'm sick or in need of seeing a doctor (counselor, therapist, GP or whatever you call it). And I don't think seeing them or taking meds will help. Because I don't believe I'm sick mentally. It's a curse for me to be. It's a stigma here so bad you will be label as a crazy person. I fear being so and I'm also not convinced I am. I have never materialize my pain. It's all invisible and I have never spoken to anyone in detail about this. It's all hidden deep. So deep at times I forget. I know there's something wrong with me. I think my family do. I did tried to tell my mum before but it certainly seems more like monday blues or attention-seeking to her, something that will pass on before she knows it. If only she knows. I'm putting on a false front. Everything's okay and happy so she won't worried. They are in denial. I feel perhaps I'm the same too. Yet, I'm still ready to say I want to die. Anyone understand this feeling?