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Do you still have debt when you're dead?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Cloudbreaker, Sep 11, 2008.

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  1. Cloudbreaker

    Cloudbreaker Member

    I'd just like to know. I just found out my only brother stole my identity. Opened up many credit cards under my name and now I have so much debt I can't even get a car loan to get out of his house (which I know is what he wants, and what his wife wants).

    I'm getting so sick of getting a curve ball spun into another shocking twist in my life. My mom hates me, my dad kills himself, and now my last link in this world only sees me is some fucking walking credit card. I'm so sickened and saddened by this. I can't believe this. I could get out of this if I filed reports and got the police involved but I would never do that for the sake of my nephews and niece. What he did is illegal and would go to jail if I reported this and he expresses himself like it was no big deal when I confronted him about it. I can't believe he would take advantage of me like this and know that I wouldn't do anything about it.

    Now it's pretty much proven I have no one left in this world who cares about me, who respects me, or even wants to be around me. What did I do to be treated like this really? I must have done some terrible crap to be abandoned by everyone I cared about, and I thought cared about me, one by one. I would run away from here and go as far away, but I can't with my credit, I'd just wind up homeless. I'd rather die. I just don't have a gun like my dad did. I just feel trapped, alone, and abandoned in many ways. I can't stay here and I have no where to go. So what's the only other logical choice?
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi Cloudbreaker. What your brother did to you was terrible. He took advantage of your good credit and has now destroyed your credit rating. If it was a stranger that did this, you would have surely gone to the police and filed a report, but since this is your brother, you are reluctant. I think he needs to learn his lesson that identity theft is illegal. If he has to serve jail time, then so be it. He would probably hate you for the rest of your lives though, so be prepared for that. A brother should not do this to his brother. He needs to pay.
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You need to notify the credit card people and have them cancelled. Also tell them it was your brother who got fake cards and screwed you. If you need to get a lawyer and see if he can get the card companies off you back and redirect it to your brother. They will probably have him arrested for fraud. If you keep being Mr. Niceguy people are going to keep using and abusing you. It is time to put your foot down and if he quits talking to you so be it. He was wrong not you.You know it might not be a bad idea to get the lawyer from the start. He will know what to do. And as far as your question what happens after death is they will go after your family for reimbursement. Probably your mom first. Good Luck and I hope this has helped you a little!!!
  4. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    To be honest, if someones taken advantage of you I'd just report him.
    So he might do jail time, he'll come out and would have thoroughly deserved it, you're still going to have to live with that even if you manage to move house into rented accommodation you'll have bailiffs banging on the door all hours of day until they can take whatever of worth.
  5. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I work in a bank so thought I would offer practical advise. I don't know if you are in the UK but here in the UK it would be advised to go to police about it. The credit people wont rectify your credit rating if you know who it is and you haven't pressed charges against them. I had this old woman once who's grandson was stealing her card and taking cash out to fund his drug habbit and as awful as it sounds the bank wouldn't do anything as she was unprepared to press charges against him, basically their viewpoint is if they are not punished it will happen again and again so we would not refund her any of the money.

    So back to the bad credit rating - how is it affected, is it missed payments or just that there is a lot of cards/loans out in your name?

    I know that you really don't want to do anything about it with the police or anything but for it to be better for you, you need to.

    Sorry if that sounds blunt, it is not my POV just stuff I know from working in a bank. I think you've gotta be careful as the credit reference agency could end up taking legal action against your brother if they are made aware of the situation and he admits it to them.

    And the answer to your 1st question? If you die and have debt if you have any estate (eg a house, life insurance etc) the debt owed will be taken out of that. If not then the debt will be wiped off.
  6. almosteasy

    almosteasy Well-Known Member

    ^^ What she said is exactly what happens to your debt when you die
  7. Cloudbreaker

    Cloudbreaker Member

    My credit is destroyed utterly. He had multiple cards out in my name to buy booze, online crap, electronics, and more booze. Over 800 dollars at least on every card not counting compounding interest and late fees. He hasn't made a single payment on any of them and refuses to pay anything back or to even admit that he did it when everything proves he did. He stole my late father's documents about me and used them too steal my identity for money. What happens to my debt after I'm dead doesn't really matter now, eh? At least I can stir up some trouble for the ones that treated me badly with no incentive to do so, right? They didn't have respect or care about me while I was alive, what'll they do after I'm gone? Charge up the cards more to have a party where they drink themselves to death? Fun.

    Each moment I spend in his house makes me want to just end everything here and now. I'm tired of being forced into situations I hate and everything revolving around money and booze and all this bull. Nothing has ever been in my control and I'm so exhausted from swimming against the current. The bad things keep rolling in and when the good things come, they're minuscule and meaningless. I'm absolutely sure my brother has a gun in this house somewhere, it's just a matter of finding it now.
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 11, 2008
  8. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I think his family would be more affected by you killing yourself than him having to pay for the punishment. I think you should report him. I am not sure how it works in the USA but if you say your ID has been stolen here then you usually get that written off. Maybe you should report it as your ID being stolen and let the police do the work that leads to him doing everything.
  9. Clockwork Reality

    Clockwork Reality Well-Known Member

    Press charges and show your brother that you're not going to be taken advantage of. Also, there are multiple agencies out there who will be willing to help you; all you have to do is ask. Get a little cash, go for a walk. Get out of the house for a day. Then report his fucking ass.
  10. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Turn him in for fraud and identity theft. You are not responsible for the things you did not do. There is no easy solution when this type of thing happens. File a report and seek legal help.
  11. Cloudbreaker

    Cloudbreaker Member

    This isn't even about just what he did to me. It's the fact that he did at all that hurts more than anything. I only imagines the people around me didn't care or like me and now I know the truth that they don't. The reasons they don't like me and why I can't even be sure. I'm completely ready to do this. A person without friends or family can't even be considered alive anyway. I didn't deserve to be treated like this, then abandoned by the people I needed, and then betrayed at the height of everything. This hurt feels like it won't subside and I just want to get this over with, when they find me gone, maybe they'll learn to treat people better than they did me.
  12. Shad

    Shad Active Member

    Hey CloudBreaker, I agree with Dave teach him a lesson. Credit is the back bone of our nation. I would make him pay everything off in full or else.
    If you came out with good credit thats one thing. But evidentally he ruined his or he wouldnt be using yours. Make him pay them off or go to the magistate or cops. I would also call the card issuing company and tell them you have no such card. And have them cancelled. Also you can go to the SSI office and change you SSI number. Its a pain in the Azz but do it to be safe. Maybe they didnt think it would hurting your feelings. Maybe they justified it in their minds some how.
    Good Luck
  13. HappyAZaClaM

    HappyAZaClaM Guest

    exactly. being a bilogical brother does not give a person
    clemency and forgiveness of debt. the bad brother needs to go
    under the bus here. not the good brother.
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