Do you think life is worth living if no one cares about you?

iloverachel

An outcast, forgotten and excluded by society
#1
Is life worth living if no one really cares?

A life of solitude, disconnected from the society and the rest of the world
 

Winslow

My Toughest Problem Has Been Solved.
SF Supporter
#8
What if you care about someone else, does that make like worth living?
The problem with that is that often times the person you care about is the person who dies. This is what happened to me because my two closest friends died years ago. That's why nowadays I prefer acquaintances only.
 

William

SF Supporter
#12
I think that every human being has intrinsic value or worth; there are no exceptions. One of my most fundamental moral beliefs is that every human being deserves to live, regardless of what the human being has said, thought, believed, intended, or done (or has not said, thought, believed, intended, or done), what attribute and/or attitude the human being has, and/or the number of other human beings who have affection toward the human being. I can assert that it is quite possibly my most fundamental moral belief; one that defines me to my core, and on which all of my other moral beliefs are based. Nonetheless, I know that my most fundamental moral belief conflicts with my other moral beliefs (my stance on abortion and suicide), but I will elucidate that in some other message one day. I am trying to find ways to harmonize all of my moral beliefs. It is a part of my goal of becoming a better person. Consequently, that would mean that I am strongly against capital punishment. I think that life has meaning regardless of if one is an extreme social butterfly with hundreds of acquaintances, or if one is an extreme hermit whom no one knows, or about whom no one cares. The value or worth of a human being shall not be ascertained based on achievements, failures, status, prestige, reputation, wealth, beauty, popularity, fame (or infamy), connections/ties, privilege, socioeconomic and/or educational background; aesthetic preferences (such as preferences related to music, film, television, food, apparel, and so on), influence/impact, nationality, language/dialect/idiolect, religion, culture/subculture, ethnicity, race, gender, sexual orientation, genealogy/genetics, material possessions, et cetera.


Unfortunately, we live in a society that places much, if not, excessive value, on those things. As an illustrative instance, the value of a woman is judged primarily on her appearance; hence, physically unattractive women are less valued than physically attractive women. In a general sense, wealthy people are valued more than poor people; masculine men are valued more than androgynous or effeminate men; theists are valued more than agnostics and atheists; homeowners are valued more than the homeless; Whites are valued more than Blacks (and every other race; however, in some aspects, such as intelligence/education, Asians are valued more than Whites (by the way, I am Black)); natives are valued more than foreigners; cisgender people are valued more than transgender people; tall men are valued more than short men; straight people are valued more than gay and bisexual people; the middle class are valued more than the lower class; celebrities are valued more than non-celebrities; jocks are valued more than geeks and nerds; people who wear stylish attire are valued more than those who do not; and thin people are valued more than fat people. It is because of those things, that a value is placed on every human being, and based on that, according to our society, there is no inherent value or worth in every human being, and yet I disagree with that. To me, a rich person is no better or more valuable than a homeless person. Therefore, it does not matter if anyone cares about one, or if millions of people love one. One has intrinsic value or worth in spite of any of that.
 

Acy

Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense
Admin
SF Supporter
#13
HI, @iloverachel - so many ways to look at this.

First, if you are feeling that no one cares about you, I want you to know and really take in that I care about you. You are not alone and uncared for. And looking over your threads and the people you respond to, I’m certain there are many others here who care about you.

Next, even if we don’t hear that people care for us, we cannot read their minds. They might care very much and be the type who cannot express it. Or they haven’t said it…yet. We just don’t know.

Life is not only about the people who care about us, but also about the people we care about. That includes ourselves. In fact, many might say it must begin with us. That way there is always someone who cares. Along the same lines, the caring and giving we give to others can offer purpose and meaning to our own life. You do a lot of supporting people here. I see you do that a lot. That’s a wonderful trait and makes you a very special person. The people you support are very likely more appreciative than you know…even if they tell you, they might not be able to express how much you mean to them. You are cared about and you matter and you have a part and a place in the world.

I think your question comes from a place of uncertainty inside you. I’m sorry if that sounds mean. I don’t intend it to. I suspect that you give a lot…perhaps even to some people who don’t return or appreciate your caring. Yes, there are people like that. It can hurt so much when people are that way that we can easily overlook the ones who do appreciate us and care back. Sometimes the people we expected or still expect to care about us are the very people who don’t/can’t/won’t (e.g., family, people we think are close friends) and that can feel awful. Their lack of caring doesn’t diminish the care that other people have for us. If they can’t/won’t care, we might have to accept that, choose our own self-care to replace it, and the love and caring from the people who do appreciate us.

Life is worth living if we can see beauty, kindness, love, caring, generosity, humour — no matter the source. Please don’t let the stingy people, or the ones who are too f*cked up to care when they are the very ones we feel are “supposed to care” be a reason to feel “uncared about.” You have friends and people who care about you right here. I’m sure there are people irl who also care. And because you are so caring here, I expect you are irl, too. So there are people who know you to be good, caring person. There are very likely people who care about you in return.

Remember: I care about. you!
 

iloverachel

An outcast, forgotten and excluded by society
#14
@William and @Acy
Thanks for taking the time to write those posts!
Lots of great points you made William, about every life having value and meaning despite circumstances, I totally agree

Thank you Acy that means a lot. My post was more about the people i encounter in real life. I know on here lots of people are nice supportive and caring. Its when i leave the house and into the real world where no one really cares
 

Saint Rita

Believe in yourself!
#15
HI, @iloverachel - so many ways to look at this.

First, if you are feeling that no one cares about you, I want you to know and really take in that I care about you. You are not alone and uncared for. And looking over your threads and the people you respond to, I’m certain there are many others here who care about you.

Next, even if we don’t hear that people care for us, we cannot read their minds. They might care very much and be the type who cannot express it. Or they haven’t said it…yet. We just don’t know.

Life is not only about the people who care about us, but also about the people we care about. That includes ourselves. In fact, many might say it must begin with us. That way there is always someone who cares. Along the same lines, the caring and giving we give to others can offer purpose and meaning to our own life. You do a lot of supporting people here. I see you do that a lot. That’s a wonderful trait and makes you a very special person. The people you support are very likely more appreciative than you know…even if they tell you, they might not be able to express how much you mean to them. You are cared about and you matter and you have a part and a place in the world.

I think your question comes from a place of uncertainty inside you. I’m sorry if that sounds mean. I don’t intend it to. I suspect that you give a lot…perhaps even to some people who don’t return or appreciate your caring. Yes, there are people like that. It can hurt so much when people are that way that we can easily overlook the ones who do appreciate us and care back. Sometimes the people we expected or still expect to care about us are the very people who don’t/can’t/won’t (e.g., family, people we think are close friends) and that can feel awful. Their lack of caring doesn’t diminish the care that other people have for us. If they can’t/won’t care, we might have to accept that, choose our own self-care to replace it, and the love and caring from the people who do appreciate us.

Life is worth living if we can see beauty, kindness, love, caring, generosity, humour — no matter the source. Please don’t let the stingy people, or the ones who are too f*cked up to care when they are the very ones we feel are “supposed to care” be a reason to feel “uncared about.” You have friends and people who care about you right here. I’m sure there are people irl who also care. And because you are so caring here, I expect you are irl, too. So there are people who know you to be good, caring person. There are very likely people who care about you in return.

Remember: I care about. you!
I completely agree with you and care about @iloverachel
 

seabird

meandering home
SF Supporter
#16
It's not only a personal suffering issue, but a social & a philosophical issue to me @iloverachel . So it's hard to discuss because I feel I'd be saying too much.
- on the personal level: if you got on a plane and flew to where I am I'd absolutely drive to the airport to pick you up and spend a couple of weeks talking & eating with you.

- On the societal level; yes there are so many humans that many of us end up isolated due to all sorts of factors. Humans aren't programmed to reach out to those they don't already include in their perseption as being part of their group. The measurements for their group being a construct in their own heads. So that leaves the ball in our court to search for a person(s) similar to ourselves. Ugh. That is hard and a person's entire life might go by without success. That does not mean their life is worth less or worthless.

- in terms of philosophical approach to this, I'd say to read Epictetus, & Marcus Aurelius' Meditations.
If you're ever in Sydney, Abbey's has their books. Plus, going to bookstores gives you a bit of relaxed social contact but that's just my opinion.

hugs
- s
 

iloverachel

An outcast, forgotten and excluded by society
#17
It's not only a personal suffering issue, but a social & a philosophical issue to me @iloverachel . So it's hard to discuss because I feel I'd be saying too much.
- on the personal level: if you got on a plane and flew to where I am I'd absolutely drive to the airport to pick you up and spend a couple of weeks talking & eating with you.

- On the societal level; yes there are so many humans that many of us end up isolated due to all sorts of factors. Humans aren't programmed to reach out to those they don't already include in their perseption as being part of their group. The measurements for their group being a construct in their own heads. So that leaves the ball in our court to search for a person(s) similar to ourselves. Ugh. That is hard and a person's entire life might go by without success. That does not mean their life is worth less or worthless.

- in terms of philosophical approach to this, I'd say to read Epictetus, & Marcus Aurelius' Meditations.
If you're ever in Sydney, Abbey's has their books. Plus, going to bookstores gives you a bit of relaxed social contact but that's just my opinion.

hugs
- s
I completely agree with you and care about @iloverachel
Thank you both for the kindness and caring as always *hug
 

Livelife

SF Supporter
#20
I think that every human being has intrinsic value or worth; there are no exceptions. One of my most fundamental moral beliefs is that every human being deserves to live, regardless of what the human being has said, thought, believed, intended, or done (or has not said, thought, believed, intended, or done), what attribute and/or attitude the human being has, and/or the number of other human beings who have affection toward the human being. I can assert that it is quite possibly my most fundamental moral belief; one that defines me to my core, and on which all of my other moral beliefs are based. Nonetheless, I know that my most fundamental moral belief conflicts with my other moral beliefs (my stance on abortion and suicide), but I will elucidate that in some other message one day. I am trying to find ways to harmonize all of my moral beliefs. It is a part of my goal of becoming a better person. Consequently, that would mean that I am strongly against capital punishment. I think that life has meaning regardless of if one is an extreme social butterfly with hundreds of acquaintances, or if one is an extreme hermit whom no one knows, or about whom no one cares. The value or worth of a human being shall not be ascertained based on achievements, failures, status, prestige, reputation, wealth, beauty, popularity, fame (or infamy), connections/ties, privilege, socioeconomic and/or educational background; aesthetic preferences (such as preferences related to music, film, television, food, apparel, and so on), influence/impact, nationality, language/dialect/idiolect, religion, culture/subculture, ethnicity, race, gender, sexual orientation, genealogy/genetics, material possessions, et cetera.


Unfortunately, we live in a society that places much, if not, excessive value, on those things. As an illustrative instance, the value of a woman is judged primarily on her appearance; hence, physically unattractive women are less valued than physically attractive women. In a general sense, wealthy people are valued more than poor people; masculine men are valued more than androgynous or effeminate men; theists are valued more than agnostics and atheists; homeowners are valued more than the homeless; Whites are valued more than Blacks (and every other race; however, in some aspects, such as intelligence/education, Asians are valued more than Whites (by the way, I am Black)); natives are valued more than foreigners; cisgender people are valued more than transgender people; tall men are valued more than short men; straight people are valued more than gay and bisexual people; the middle class are valued more than the lower class; celebrities are valued more than non-celebrities; jocks are valued more than geeks and nerds; people who wear stylish attire are valued more than those who do not; and thin people are valued more than fat people. It is because of those things, that a value is placed on every human being, and based on that, according to our society, there is no inherent value or worth in every human being, and yet I disagree with that. To me, a rich person is no better or more valuable than a homeless person. Therefore, it does not matter if anyone cares about one, or if millions of people love one. One has intrinsic value or worth in spite of any of that.
Well covered. Not that anyone asked but I'd like to go ahead and add one in that I'm experiencing also. Youth, I'll include those say 45 or 50 and under, is valued and more visible than aged. And if one is older and not financially well endowed it exponentially increases the devaluation and visibility.
 

Please Donate to Help Keep SF Running

Total amount
$70.00
Goal
$255.00
Top