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Do you want to be happy (again)?

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Why? What's the point? I just don't understand. As long as I don't feel pain again and as long as I don't have to cry again...I've cried enough for one lifetime...I'll be fine. There's no point in feeling human emotions again.


Well-Known Member
Being happy is really great. And when you are happy you realise why and you don't want it to stop.

Problem is when you aren't you forget what it's like.
There's no point trying to make yourself psychotic - that would be rather foolish and pointless. A person who feels no emotions is called a psychopath (born that way) or a sociopath (made that way by society/upbringing) - and their mental state is not good. Take a look into the lives of people like that in society and see how they are treated - you see my point? If you don't like the way people treat you now, wait till you see all the fun society has ready for a mental disease with way more stigma behind it than depression.

Because here's something many people won't tell you about psy/sociopaths - they do actually feel emotion. But their defences are so incredibely high they can no longer show emotions like people normally do.
Here's an example of what I'm talking about (the other stuff about it is all in Psychology books):

When a person claims to no longer wish to feel emotions they are raising their defences too high so that they cut themselves out from the rest of the world, thinking this will help them. Defences when too low cause unneccessary grief because we are too vulnerable - defences too high cause us to feel only isolated and depressed. The key is to find a happy medium, that way you will not be so phazed by things that happen in life.

My final thing to say, and people can argue against me till they're blue in the face but I'm standing by this :
Everyone wants to be loved, you cannot escape your basic needs. Look at the psychopaths, who loves them? If you bury your emotions/raise your defences like that you'll end up with no one loving you. And that is not what you really want. Cherish the fact that there are people out there that care. Stop listening to your depression speaking, and start listening to yourself, not the depression and it's words, you.



Too Jawa,..

Im a very social person and have alot of friends, yet I dont usually care about a single thing,.. what does that make me?
Ermmm. I disacossiate.. so I do feel emotions and etc.. just really never been happy, kinda releived.. but not happen... hense constant abuse does that. But hey I feel depression and sadness, don't think i'm a sociopath :(


Well-Known Member
Do I want to be happy again? Wouldn't I have to have experienced "happiness" to know? :huh:
Hence the brackets around "again." =P

I know happiness is a great feeling. I vaguely remember it. Besides, I see it everyday. I used to envy them, but not anymore. I simply can't bring myself to care. It seems as if I've lost the desire to be happy. What really is the point in experiencing it if we all die in the end regardless?

Wasting countless hours, I'd lie in my bed trying to justify why I'm like this. The best rationalization I've conjured says that I'm trying to preserve my life. To feel happy again inevitably brings sadness. They are two sides of the same coin; you cannot experience one without experiencing the other as they balance each other out delicately. But I don't want to cry again. I don't think I'll survive it. Thus, I'm refusing the whole coin because it's seems to be an all or nothing deal. I'm sitting in the exact middle. In a way, I seem to have found the perfect balance.

And Jawa, I don't seem to fit an adequate description of a psychopath. If I am erecting walls, it's not deteriorating me. I may be more alone than ever, but I no longer feel lonely nor depressed. I just don't care about that anymore.


Well-Known Member
yah, I want happiness, joy, appreciation, success and all that stuff at the top of the emotional scale. But I am SO FAR from it. I am down in the depression, fear and despair mode about 90% of the time.

I am trying to find the thought that feels better ( as one guru puts it ). :ohmy:


Sure I would like to be happy again. I am not sure I can achieve what I had prior to the assault. I would have to accept that I am not the same person. Thus any return to happiness would not be the same as before. But it could be better? Those of us that have been down the long path of depresson for many years will find it difficult at best to reach for happiness again and some of us never will. I do not foresee happiness for me in my limited future.
And Jawa, I don't seem to fit an adequate description of a psychopath. If I am erecting walls, it's not deteriorating me. I may be more alone than ever, but I no longer feel lonely nor depressed. I just don't care about that anymore.
Depression goes through stages. People typically refer to the stage you are at as being numb; after that stage comes anger. It's not that you're not feeling anything, you're just pushing your emotions to the back of your mind until you are better able to deal with them. On a more positive note, it means that you are coming closer to your recovery from depressioin, so have that to look forward to.

You're gonna end up adapting and letting your defences down one way or another - whether you want it to or not. Just sit back and enjoy the ride.


lol hell no, Im never insecure about anything,.. I think im just a very indifferent person,.. I just dont really care xD


lol, dont act like you know everything mate.
I know who I am and I have no problem being that way.

I think that your labeling of people makes you alot more insecure then you "assume" I am.
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