Doctor problems..

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Avarice, Jul 14, 2010.

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  1. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I don't really know if it's a good idea to post this.. the last thread I created here went ignored, and maybe this one will too, we'll just have to see.

    Well.. I went to the doctors and told him all my problems (anxiety, depression), told him about how I want to kill myself, how difficult it is for me to be in social situations, that I avoid going out, never think I'll get married, etc., and his response was kinda.. eh. >_<

    I'll start by saying he's religious. I have no problems with that, but it effected his responses and it kinda made me feel worse. When I told him I want to kill myself he said, "No. Worst idea you've ever had. Don't think that", as if it's as simple as that.. when I mentioned I never thought I'd get married and have kids, he said, "Have you ever asked God for a child?" I said no.. I'm 19.. come on.. he said, "Well then.. try asking". I have nothing against him or his God; I believe in God myself; but God isn't going to make me pregnant. When I said I avoid going out he said, "Don't. Don't avoid it". He makes it all sound so simple, like I can just turn the button off. But I can't. I can't just change who I am and who I've been for the my whole entire life.. So he's sorting out counselling for me. He thinks a few sessions there will make me better again.

    I told him I have avoidant personality disorder and he said, "No. I don't believe you've got a personality disorder. It's social anxiety, that's all. We'll get you sorted out in no time". Is this reaction normal or what? I'm confused.. he completely ignored the things I said. He hasn't even said anything about my depression. He's told me not to kill myself and as far as he's conerned that's the depression sorted. He didn't mention anti-depressants or even ask me why I felt that way. I can't figure out if I'm just weird for not being able to turn this obvious switch on and off and control my life or if he's just being ... idk what. wrong? :mellow:
  2. Dragon

    Dragon Staff Alumni

    I would ditch this guy and see another doctor, if you can. What he did was incredibly unprofessional and it seems that he was trivialising your problems either because you're young or some other reason.

    I'm sorry you had to go through that hun :hug:
  3. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    I second that notion. He shouldn't be prophesying either, not in that situation.

    This is the problem with doctors. If you don't have a broken or something, they refuse to believe that anything's wrong. :|
  4. ema

    ema Antiquities Friend

    Was the doc a psych or a regular doc? If a regular doc, I would ask for a referral to a psychiatrist.

    If a psych or therapis, I say ditch him and find somebody else to try. That was horrible. God doesn't magically sovle these problems. And it isn't as easy as saying, "don't think that way."

    No good.
  5. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I could try seeing someone else, but it'd probably mean going to a different doctors practice, and I'm not sure if I'm allowed to go to any other one aside from the one I'm registered at. At my doctors there are certain doctors that specialize in certain areas - I'm not sure what he specializes in but everytime I make a mental related appointment I get sent to him. I don't want to hurt his feelings either, by requesting they let me see someone else inside the practice. >_<

    He was a regular GP.. but he's acting like some kind of therapist. I thought I'd get referred to a counsellor and psy doc and get help from there. But he's asking me to make appointments with him every two weeks to go and talk about my feelings and how my life is going. It's very confusing because I didn't expect that from a regular doctor..
  6. ema

    ema Antiquities Friend

    No, no, no, no, no. You do not see a GP about your feelings and stuff. He is acting outside his speciality and that is not acceptable. If you are in the US, I'm not sure that's even legal.

    You don't need to worry about hurthing his feelings. You are there for professional help, not to be nice.

    Ask for somebody else, and ask that it be a counselor or somebody specifically trained in psych.

    You've got to take care of yourself and that means get the proper help!
  7. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I live in the UK, I'm not sure if it's legal over here or not. He said that he put in a referral for me to see a counsellor two weeks ago but thus far they haven't been in contact. Once they get in contact and I start seeing them, I think our two weekly appointments will stop (I hope) and hopefully this new counsellor will listen to me more openly and accept how I feel. When I went to see this same doctor three years ago with the same problem he told me I was just shy and sent me back home. >_< It's taken me a year of planning and avoiding to go back to him and ask for his help again after that. I don't think I'll go to him about any mental problems I may have after this. I think he lacks understanding..
  8. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    He doesn't understand how psychology works, it's not his job. He shouldn't pretend otherwise.
  9. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    Hi Avarice,

    If there are other Dr's within your practice then you should be able to request an appt with any of them. I can only speak from my own experience but the 2 week 'watchful waiting' is very common in the UK, more often than not they will do this before deciding on medication or further referalls. Please don't be put off by your experience, what he said was unprofessional but if he wants to see you again, then please go or get an appt with someone else.

    Years ago when I first went to the Dr's they dismissed me in a rather nonchalent manner. It took me months to pluck up the courage & go, I think that was some time in September or October & they told me to come back in the January. At that point I was so depressed I didn't care, I just remember thinking that I'd be dead by then. By chance I also had an appt with the nurse & she picked up on my symptoms, she referred me to the mental health team & I was assigned a cpn. She referred me to a psychologist & a psychiatrist & I also met with her every week instead of having to see my GP. She also got all my meds arranged for me too.

    Anyways, I've rambled on a bit here. Perhaps you could go back to the GP & ask about a referral to your community mental health team. They obviously have more experience & it could be beneficial, especially in the interim whilst waiting for your counselling as usually these appt's can take a few months to come through.

    Take care :hug:
  10. Azmodius

    Azmodius Well-Known Member

    Having worked alongside doctors numerous times (and coming from a medical family), the quality of doctors and their attitude to depression and related illnesses is hit and miss.
    I've had some appalling experiences, and some good ones.
    It sounds like you've had the former, go to a different doctor first off, and ask for a referral to the mental health team. Again, if you get a poor one, don't be shy, ask for a different one.
    Your health is something so important, feel free to look around till you're happy!

    Hope that helps, if you need further advice (this is an area I actually know a bit about), feel free to ask me!
  11. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    Thank you all for your replies, they've been very helpful! I've been contemplating the idea of making another appointment tomorrow and asking him for a referral for a psychological examination, or whatever it is they call it, 'just in case' he's wrong (which I know he is). I find it so frustrating how when it comes to depression and things like that, that a health professional can sometimes think that they know more about what you feel that you do. If he doesn't listen to me this time I think I'll find out what my rights are to go to another practice and see if I can see someone else. It's a shame that in cases like this that the health professionals fail to realise the impact that their reaction has on their patient. :grr:

    Thank you as well to Azmodius for your advice, I'll take you up on that offer if need be. :]
  12. Azmodius

    Azmodius Well-Known Member

    I completely agree with you, my Nurse friend said about Doctors:

    'Being empathetic isn't a pre-requisite for being a doctor, that's why they have us nurses!'

    Some are good, others are not! You're doing the right thing though! Let me know how it works out for you. Good luck for tomorrow!
  13. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    Wish there were nurses like that in my doctors practice, aside from the doctors the only others there are the moody receptionists!
    Thank you for the support and I'll update tomorrow with how it went, if I don't avoid it (stupid disorder)! >_<

    EDIT: Crap. Completely forgot it's my birthday tomorrow. Have to spend time with family. I'm such an idiot. XD
    It'll have to be monday or tuesday.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 15, 2010
  14. Azmodius

    Azmodius Well-Known Member

    Happy birthday for tomorrow! Have a great day with family instead!
    Whenever you decide to go, don't pressure yourself too much (do it at your pace), I'll be here if needed after!
  15. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    Thanks. :] I'll do my best!
  16. ema

    ema Antiquities Friend

    Absolutely, find another doctor. You've got to be comfortable in order for help to work. And, your health is the issue, not their feelings, so don't feel worried about asking for other options.

    Don't give up!! Remember, we're all behind you.
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