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Does anyone check in here daily?

#1
Hi friends...I am really not sure I am going to win this battle, however was thinking that maybe if I check in daily I will have a greater chance of staying around. I don’t want to be obnoxious, though realistically I already know that I am a broken record here...repeating the same stuff over and over. I am doing all I can to get better but until I forgive myself and the person who hurt me and thus started all this, there is not a medicine or therapy in the world that will help. I so adore my family and want to live, just not like this. Most do not know the extent of my suffering so I hold on....for how much longer I do not know. I am consumed with guilt and shame.

So, bottom line...the question is....have any of you long time members found that by checking in with other members daily or at least a few times a week it has helped you? Thanks.
 

MarvelFan

Vanity of Vanities
#2
I dont check in daily, But I do come on sometimes even though I am having a migraine or sick to my stomach and cant say much I feel I owe to some people here. My thing is a 50/50 issue I put in 50 percent and hope I get 50 percent out.

If that happens then I am happy if it doesn't come back to me equal I don't worry because I know there are many people busy or tired that cant get back to me so that is that =)
 

Inanimate

Well-Known Member
#3
Once every solar eclipse. At first, the anguish can be so overbearing that I don’t find myself particularly motivated to reach out to other people. However, crying for help just gets so tedious that I might eventually give my emotional reserves some other utility. It can be somewhat gratifying to have a dialogue in the interest of someone else when I have no other convenient way to express myself. By and large, I suppose this site sustains itself on these mutual interactions (save for donations).
 

MarvelFan

Vanity of Vanities
#5
Yeah. I check on this forum almost daily and I also check in with my mom daily.
@ShyGuy that is a blessed thing. My parents did some horrible shit to me but I dont care how much I hate them I know people turn their heads from their mom and their dad and I know their reason I know many pf peoples reasons. My my situation I can not do that maybe its just me.

Yes I know sometimes we got to give on some people maybe thats my fault I could never ever give up on my parents, not talking is ok but I will never abandon anyone even if they abandon me or hated me. They got divorced when I was five so much hatred.

I have love for even my enemies even though I know how to be strong and how to fight in all the ways in life
 

Waves

Well-Known Member
#6
@ShyGuy that is a blessed thing. My parents did some horrible shit to me but I dont care how much I hate them I know people turn their heads from their mom and their dad and I know their reason I know many pf peoples reasons. My my situation I can not do that maybe its just me.

Yes I know sometimes we got to give on some people maybe thats my fault I could never ever give up on my parents, not talking is ok but I will never abandon anyone even if they abandon me or hated me. They got divorced when I was five so much hatred.

I have love for even my enemies even though I know how to be strong and how to fight in all the ways in life
Ryan right? ☺️ You have a heart. Miss that.
 

Gonz

👫❤️🙂💊🚑💀💔😥
#7
That is exactly how I use this place, and I know I'm not the only one. I think that's how most people could get the best use from the forum.

And quit apologizing for repeating yourself. You're far from the worst when it comes to that (I'm in the running and I don't need the competition, lol).

There's only so much that can be done when we're in "crisis mode." But having a space where you can check in as often as you need to with other people who "get it," every day (or even multiple times a day) if you need to, can dramatically reduce the frequency of those crises.
 

Dark111

FORMER SF SUPPORTER
#9
Hi friends...I am really not sure I am going to win this battle, however was thinking that maybe if I check in daily I will have a greater chance of staying around. I don’t want to be obnoxious, though realistically I already know that I am a broken record here...repeating the same stuff over and over. I am doing all I can to get better but until I forgive myself and the person who hurt me and thus started all this, there is not a medicine or therapy in the world that will help. I so adore my family and want to live, just not like this. Most do not know the extent of my suffering so I hold on....for how much longer I do not know. I am consumed with guilt and shame.

So, bottom line...the question is....have any of you long time members found that by checking in with other members daily or at least a few times a week it has helped you? Thanks.
That's a good H, that you at least seem to know what is keeping you stuck.

Certain life events can have a deep & lasting impact on us, and sometimes we do need to keep talking about it, exhaustively. Sometimes there's no much wounding & toxicity involved, that's what it takes. Sometimes we have good reason for staying stuck because getting unstuck might terrify us. Whatever the reason is, honor yourself as you go through this.
 

kittykatt

Well-Known Member
#11
Dear Hating,

I'm sorry to hear that you are in such pain. I understand where you are coming from because I've had a similar experience. So rather than answering your question, I'd like to address something that you said. You mentioned that until you can forgive yourself and the other person who started it, you will continue to have problems. I know what it's like to have a problem that you can't get over. My suggestion is that you just learn to live with what happened. Don't try to figure out forgiveness. That might come in time. Just accept the event and the consequences of it. What ever happened, hate the event but don't hate yourself even if you are responsible for it. Learn from what happened and then try to move on. I know that's easier said than done. But time may lesson the strength of the event and cause you to forget parts of it. (This may/may not work) -- What will help that is to not keep reliving it. Don't have anything around you that will keep the memories alive, especially anything written down.

Good luck and I hope that what I've said will help you.
 

SillyOldBear

SF grey-haired bear 🐻
Staff Alumni
#12
So, bottom line...the question is....have any of you long time members found that by checking in with other members daily or at least a few times a week it has helped you? Thanks.
I do, and it definitely helps. Helps me to keep things in perspective, and to get to know some really good people. I highly recommend it.
 
#16
Dear Hating,

I'm sorry to hear that you are in such pain. I understand where you are coming from because I've had a similar experience. So rather than answering your question, I'd like to address something that you said. You mentioned that until you can forgive yourself and the other person who started it, you will continue to have problems. I know what it's like to have a problem that you can't get over. My suggestion is that you just learn to live with what happened. Don't try to figure out forgiveness. That might come in time. Just accept the event and the consequences of it. What ever happened, hate the event but don't hate yourself even if you are responsible for it. Learn from what happened and then try to move on. I know that's easier said than done. But time may lesson the strength of the event and cause you to forget parts of it. (This may/may not work) -- What will help that is to not keep reliving it. Don't have anything around you that will keep the memories alive, especially anything written down.

Good luck and I hope that what I've said will help you.
Love that idea...it’s what I need to do. I think that is where my ocd kicks in. Unfortunately, part of the event involves my brother who there is a constant trigger. Good advice though...in time I hope the pain will lessen. Thanks,
 

extraterrestrialone

any? many? just a few will do!
SF Supporter
#17
i’m not so sure i’m a long time member, sincd i’ve only been here for 3 and a half or so years... actually i rarely log off. and i do my best to communicate with others even though i nearly naturally have a wall between me and others i can’t seem to break down, but being here as much as i can does actually help me.
I don’t want to be obnoxious
and then at the same time i have been told “irl” at least and probably its true here too that i am being obnoxious. i don’t know... its just a fear...
Most do not know the extent of my suffering so I hold on....for how much longer I do not know.
yup, this is/was true for me too but i also think that the longer i’m here, the more i move toward healing, proactivity, safety, and becoming the real me...
have any of you long time members found that by checking in with other members daily or at least a few times a week it has helped you? Thanks.
so yeah, being here does help. i do think it may be different for everyone but it at least is surrogate friendship and things to do that i need. i do think that looking forward is a very important thing to do at the same time.
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
#18
I check in most days depending on schedule at work and whatever I have planned here at the house, and yes, it can be a great thing to hear how others are doing, possibly have advice to share.
 

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