... to be with someone and still feel utterly alone? I used to think that nothing could be worse than being chronically single (as in the "Forever Alone" meme). As it turns out, there is something worse. Being stuck in a bad relationship, and a bad marriage in particular, is worse. There is no love, no passion. Yet I'm still obligated to cater to her, to take care of her, to share my life, time and money with her, and to forsake all others as well as any chance I have of ever meeting someone I could truly love. I married someone I didn't love out of desperation because I didn't want to die alone. Now I wish I was alone and I desperately want to die. Out of the pot and into the frying pan, so to speak. And before someone says "you could always get a divorce", I already tried that route. Long story short, it didn't work out, and now I feel worse for even trying. Nothing like a heaping pile of guilt on top of your miserable pie to make you feel extra shitty about yourself. I took a vow, "till death do us part". Seems like that's my only way out. Now cue all the stone throwers to call me a bad person and tell me I'm going to hell. That's what they told me at the last forum, anyway. Don't worry, if such a place exists, I'm sure I will feel right at home there. What better way to cap off a lifetime of misery than an afterlife filled with eternal suffering? God is nothing if not consistent.