Does anything ever change?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by xan, Oct 6, 2014.

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  1. xan

    xan Chat Buddy

    What's the point? Seriously... I don't want anything. This isn't a 'I wish I had x or y' cry for help. I thought I'd be better with love or money but it is all meaningless. I can't feel the emotions I know I should feel and I shuffle through life reflecting back what people show me just to get by. I'll bury my troubles down so deep that they'll not see the light of day. Yet when I'm driving alone at night <mod edit - methods>. I'll hold my hand under the hot tap even after the pain starts to burn. I'll look at <mod edit - methods>with longing desire.

    2 weeks from now I'll have been a member for 8 years... What have I done in that time that makes any of this worthwhile...
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 6, 2014
  2. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    You can't expect to feel anything when you shield parts of you from life.
    It can change, but you have to do the hardest things, which is face yourself, and somehow heal and open what you've locked away.

    Atleast that's what I know. 9 Years for me here, going on 10. And I'll be honest, Ive had very little time to myself. But when I get it, it's very liberating, and essentially dangerous because that opportunity arises to face what I shield away. Problem is, you need a game plan generally. But things can change. They are for me. But I have to be very careful and very honest.
    Somehow you have to let yourself feel alive. And not speeding a car down the highway. If you're going to do that, you need absolute discipline and control.

    Anyhow.. i'm sure you've done loads in those 8 years. Among anything learnt how to better connect with yourself, or learn how you avoid and lock yourself away from dealing with your issues, so they can stand upfront with you as you experience life.
     
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