I don't know whether I'm posting in the correct section of the forum. I am feeling very discouraged. I went back on medication this week, and I feel like a failure. I have been through a lot of treatment, including long-term inpatient treatment, and the revolving door of the local mental health unit, but I don't ever seem to feel better. I mean, I suppose that's not completely true. I have felt better, but never for extended periods of time. I always end up in this really dark place of feeling suicidal. I hate it here, and I hate these thoughts. I know that I don't really want to die, but I live in constant fear that I will act on these thoughts. In the past, I have always given in, because I truly believed that I wanted to die, but that's no longer the case. I have the coping skills to get through these tough times, but I'm exhausted from fighting. I just want to feel like myself again.