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Does it work for you?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Things, Aug 18, 2010.

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  1. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    I really want to try therapy again, but I keep hearing about how it doesn't help. That, and I get annoyed by people easily, and I'm very stubborn. I'm worried that I'd be too intolerant to listen to their advice.

    I don't know, has therapy ever worked for you, or anyone you know? Is it worth a try?
  2. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Therapy does work. I've tried it a couple times and it didn't go too well - once was a social anxiety group but my social anxiety got the better of me and I was too nervous to return; the other time it was being funded by my student union and I dropped out of university. But it is widely felt to work (proven? Maybe, maybe not.)

    You need three things: a competent therapist, willingness to work, and most importantly, time. Therapy is probably not going to yield major results in less than a year.

    A study has indicated the following:

    1. psychotherapy is indeed effective,
    2. the type of treatment is not a factor,
    3. the theoretical bases of the techniques used, and the strictness of adherence to those techniques are both not factors,
    4. the therapist's strength of belief in the efficacy of the technique is a factor,
    5. the personality of the therapist is a significant factor,
    6. the alliance between the patient(s) and the therapist (meaning affectionate and trusting feelings toward the therapist, motivation and collaboration of the client, and empathic response of the therapist) is a key factor.

    You need to find a therapist you can get along with and you need to stick with it. If you're as badly depressed as being on this forum implies, it'll be hard. You'll need to stick to a medication regimen as well to even stand a chance.
  3. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Thank you for your response.

    How long should I give a therapist a chance before I try another one? How do I know if they're good?
  4. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    Yes therapy has worked for me, and I'm on no long term medication. Therapy worked to help me feel stable inside and encourage some stability outside of myself while exploring a ton of issues (unstable/chaotic stuff, that's all okay it needs to be done but it was done in a stable framework) I was working with at the time, and I pretty much directed all of it. That's called "person centred"- meaning, the therapist was an aid to what I knew would make me feel better, tried to hear where I wanted to go and supported me.

    I think before you go looking try asking yourself:

    -What do you want therapy for?
    -What kind of therapist are you looking for? There are many with different experiences/training/qualifications/specialisations, who have different personalities.
    -Do you have any hopes for therapy?

    And ask therapists questions! Loads of them, if you're unsure. When you see them, you're basically drilling them if they are for you.

    Finding a therapist that you click with takes time. I'm about 3-4 months into my search, but I know what I'm looking for.

    Once you see a few therapists, you can get an idea of how they work, their personality, and if you'd get along with them. Then it's a matter of picking out the good ones and thinking: can I see myself working with this therapist for 6 months? If it's yes, then go for it. If no, then no. If you're not sure, like you are- most good therapists have session blocks of 6 weeks, where you get to know each other, and then reflect on whatever you did in that time. I'd say give it 6 weeks if you're unsure, but if you're sure you don't like someone, don't do the 6 weeks, it's a waste of time and money.
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 18, 2010
  5. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    How you know if they're good: if you get along with them. If you feel you can come to trust them. That's probably the most important part.
  6. Twinkle ☆ Twinkle

    Twinkle ☆ Twinkle Well-Known Member

    I think it depends on the type of therapy you are getting and the therapist.
    Diffrent things work for difrent people. But yeah, I think you should go ahead and give it a shot. Might do you some good.
  7. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Plates: I want a therapist to figure out my problems and fix them. I want to be less anxious, less of a doormat, and what ever flaws I can't think of right now. :/

    I haven't thought about their personality. Maybe someone that has worked with autistic people before, or at least someone that won't speak down to me (I remember a few therapists and counselors who spoke to me like I was a kindergartner. I'm not sure if it's because of my age or my autism, but either way it got under my skin).

    I am hopeful though, especially after the feedback.

    I can't wait until I'm old enough to get a job, then maybe I can pay for it myself.
  8. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    Yeah, maybe look for someone experienced with autism- I know the feeling of being spoken down to, I hate that too.
    I don't think a therapist will fix your problems but will try and help you build on the resources you have to cope with things a little better.

    I'm not sure how old you are but are there any youth voluntary organisations where you are? They might have counsellors who might not even charge a fee? :dunno:
  9. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Yeah, sorry, I meant help me fix them, or help me find a way to fix myself. I sometimes forget to type certain words in a sentence. I really don't believe that someone else can fix me, that's not what I meant. I'm sorry for the confusion.

    I'm 17. I'm not sure if there are any, I'm going to have to ask my family.

    Edit: I think I need help with my communication problems too...
  10. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    It's okay don't worry :biggrin: Best of luck.
  11. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I've been in therapy for five years.. It took me three therapists before I found the one I am with..A good therapist will make you comfortable so you can open up at your own pace.. They will teach you coping skills and the difference in cognitive distortions..Try them out for a few weeks and see if you are comfortable with them..
  12. Charlie Milles

    Charlie Milles Well-Known Member

    Depends on the therapist, I think.
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