Does posting actually help any?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by doityourself, Nov 4, 2010.

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  1. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Sometimes I feel like I should just read and not post, but then the words come to my head and I have to post, I feel like I want to reach out to someone, I want them to feel better, but do they, are my words making any difference?

    I feel like when I’m posting that my post isn’t worth the words that I’m typing, does anyone ever feel this way? Like who am I to give this person advice? Since I suffer myself, am I hurting more than helping?

    Not sure what Im asking here, just wanted to put my thoughts out there and see if anyone feels the same.
  2. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    knowing youre their means the world to me
    you help in more ways than youll ever know
    but i get what youre saying i just cant find the words to respond like you
  3. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Love you to Andi:cheekkiss
  4. down-and-maybeout

    down-and-maybeout Well-Known Member

    If I'm honest, posting to spill out my deepest feelings helps me because I have no-one else to tell them to. But I don't very often read the responses. I know that sounds kinda selfish, but it's not meant to be - it's just that it's the act of posting my feelings that helps; the replies don't really help me at all.

    That's why I don't really reply to many threads myself. I guess I feel that my opinion doesn't count for much.
  5. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    No actually that helps me alot and its not selfish.

    Never thought of it this way, thanks.
  6. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    I often read threads by clicking on "New Posts" at the top of the screen; I'm the type of person that just lurks and doesn't normally reply to threads or start threads --> I don't really have advice or plenty of experience to fall back on for me to be able to comfortably post responses.


    However, I've seen you (DoItYourself) post quite a bit lately, and I think your words do make a difference although it may not seem like it sometimes (for whatever it's worth!).


    I'm not sure what you're asking either. :tongue:
  7. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Asking if anyone actually takes these posts to heart or if its just a time killer?

    Not really looking for a go girl kinda thing but thank you.

    Just want to know how much this site actually helps people with suicide thoughts or does being on here and talking about it make it worse, does post that pretty much say the same thing get over looked, in the end its really all the same, we have to help ourselvs.
  8. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Oh, I see what you mean now. Well, I hope you receive some helpful answers to your question!
  9. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    It used to help and in some ways it still does. But after a while you see a pattern. It's a deja vu feeling. Not to be rude or ungrateful, but some people pull the same replies of some sort. It's like they have a stack of pre-made wellwishing cards. Just pull the right one out for the specific thread, sign your name and voila. This is pretty why i write my rants and stuff in my diary. I don't want any reply.

    But hey, that's just how i feel about it.
  10. alison

    alison Well-Known Member

    Honestly, I find it really helpful when people respond to my threads.

    I generally make threads on here when I'm freaking out about something that I'm too ashamed to talk about with any of my RL friends or therapist. It's all a shame thing for me. A crisis I'm going through or feelings I have that I'm not sure I should be feeling -- so I come here.

    When people respond, it's validation. Even simple responses like 'hang in there' or 'you're not crazy' help alleviate the shame and tell me what I'm going through is ok. Knowing that there are other people out in the world who think and feel similarly to me helps so much.

    I don't respond to people's threads as much as I wish I did - I tend to get nervous/paranoid that they'll hate me (its my social phobia coming into play haha). But I try to assume that more people are like me than I realize, and I try to give people validation and sympathy to let them know that it is ok that they are feeilng the way they do. If I have advice, I'll give it, but usually I'm not helpful enough to have anything smart to say, haha.
  11. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I think replies show ppl they are being heard, which can be validating...I try to read each post individually and see if I have anything to offer experiencially...if not, I do want the person to know that I read it and want only the best for him/her...I try to show compassion in each response, and yes, sometimes they seem more Hallmark card than I would like, but sometimes, it is because I have only a few grey cells left...not meant to demean the writer, but the best I can do at the time... I also hope for some, it does abate some of the feelings of being so lonely if someone can relate to what they have said...J
  12. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Thanks everyone for your replies.
  13. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    just wanted to add that i find responses to my threads very helpful. like in september when i was released from the hospital and still feeling suicidal. someone told me to go back to the hospital and let them know i got out too soon. took me a little while but that's what i eventually did. i really appreciate that anyone bothers to reply, even if it's just to say they read what i wrote.
  14. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    i appreciate good replies to my threads especially when i'm in a ton of distress. good replies mean people who are sensitive, empathetic and are hearing me well- those people stick in my memory. i appreciate those who encourage me to talk and express myself, rather than "tell me what to do" and try to do the same for others. i reply when i think i can offer something helpful or can relate to someone very well; if i can't, i don't.
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