I have never really enjoyed life in the 21 years that I have lived. I am only 20, but I am turning 21 on the 4 of September, which is sort of scary, which further makes me hate life. I just lost all my friends because they think I do drugs 24/7. I don't do them 24/7, and I mainly just drink, so they are wrong. I hate life so much, I like other people suffering just as much as I do. I sound insane? Perhaps I am. The only reason why I don't do something drastic, is because I am a coward. I'm tired of living, but afraid of dying. I'm going to Job Corp on the 20th of September. But it doesn't make me all of a sudden enjoy life. I thought I would all of a sudden get this urge to live, but I don't. I keep thinking to myself, I'm going to Job Corp, which will cause me to have to live with people in a dorm, what if I go insane on them all? I've been a recluse since I was 16 after I dropped out of Highschool. Yes, I'm a dropout, proceed with the insults if you must. I'm currently being evicted cus I don't have the 600 bucks a month anymore. And I have by the 1st to get out. I've decided to take everything I can hold, in an army duffel bag, and just leave everything else and restart. The fat ass landlord can take everything from me, for I don't need it. I don't know why I am posting this here. Maybe it's because I want some attention now? Maybe because I see all these other people post about how they want to end their lives, yet, they have a life worth living. I don't know. It gets sort of old talking to the voice in your head for the past 6 years. Anyway, here I leave this post, I probably won't check back here. One of my many marks on the internet.