Done fighting what's clearly a losing battle

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by BruceWayneWannabe, Dec 31, 2014.

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  1. BruceWayneWannabe

    BruceWayneWannabe Active Member

    I held out for as long as I could, but I'm really ready to be done with life. I don't really have anything to keep me going. I'm not good at anything; not assertive; no girlfriend because I'm scared to talk to women; haven't really had anything with the opposite sex in such a long time. I don't really enjoy anything except one thing...driving.

    Yesterday, after 16 years of driving without incident, I pulled in front of somebody I didn't see (STILL don't understand how I didn't), and got hit. My truck (something I loved very much) is most likely totaled. This was at the end of the day after I got my truck inspected and plates renewed. I was driving home for the night from getting a shirt tailored.

    So, I lost my truck of 10 years, perfect driving record, and I don't want to drive any more. Oh, and I was supposed to go back to work out of state in five days. All this, because I'm supremely stupid. I want to go now.
  2. kangaroo2

    kangaroo2 Well-Known Member

    Maybe one way to look at the situation is that you were not going to keep the truck forever anyways. One's vehicle is always at risk when on the streets. It could have been a lot worse.

    I resent women in a way. They are so hard to become intimate with. I am well into my twenties and still don't know the secret to becoming intimate with a woman.

    For me I either am not assertive when I need to be, or I am perceived as being on a power trip or pushy. I rarely seem to actually be assertive. I am always digging myself a deeper hole when I stick up for my rights that eventually I say and do mean-spirited things because at least I can bring other people down with me when I am already helpless. Being mean is not in my nature though. It is just a gesture of helplessness and seeing myself as the victim.
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    It sounds like you were very lucky to get out of that accident without injury, so glad that you are okay. I do not drive but I know 16 years of driving without injury is excellent, my sister has been in 2 crashes and my brother in several, he injured his back quite badly so count your blessings on that one.

    I do hope you reconsider and stay around, keep and keep working on talking to women, the more you do it the more you will feel at ease, much like everything else in life. If you are not confident then act confident, women love confidence :)

    Best of luck to you.
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOu have a excellent driving record hun even some insurance companies will forgive first accident i am glad you were not hurt or anyone else hun You arein shock right now but give it time ok and hopefully you can find a new vehicle that will match your old one in some ways
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