I'm trying so hard to fight. To make it through this yet one more time. But I know that I can't. People say that others post because they are somehow holding out for help or whatever. Well I realize that I think I am holding on because I dont want to disappopoint anyone. And that fucking sucks. And the thoughts are finally telling me the truth. That means that I'm putting everyone before my own needs yet again. Cuz where is everyone when I need them? The last couple of days have been sheer Hell and I'm alone. I'm NOT strong like everyone seems to think I am. I'M NOT!!!!! This has been the hardest fight yet and for what? People seem to think they know me but they are so wrong. I'm a weakling, I'm alone, I'm scared and I just want to die! And I dont see anything wrong with that anymore. The sun will come up tomorrow and nothing will every change, not for me, it hasnt and it wont. Let me go please!