done

[MoAnamCara]

today i want to end it all. i am sick of it all. sick of people, of cancer, of trying to live and getting nowhere.

i just can't do this. i can't.

but who cares

 

[kirstyx]

I care...

I'm new on here don't really know how to work this but I'm here if you want to talk

I'm sorry your feeling so bad

 

[icequeen]

well for one...i do.... :console:

can you phone a crisis line...spill it out to a real voice, sometimes it helps...cry cry and cry some more...get the tension out.

if you go, what will happen to your OH...how will she feel knowing or thinking that she pushed you to this, you are a better than this.

i wish i could follow my own advice, but go for a jog, run up and down stairs a dozen times, wallow in the tub...music...just try and distract yourself, and it will pass...long enough to get you through another day....it did for me yesterday and it can for you today...

:pinkrose::hug:

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thank you for caring when it feels like no one else does.

bloody tears need to stop this afternoon.

I won't do anything, not while she is alive, I wouldnt' do that to her.

But I feel SO trapped, just trying to hold off a panic attack right now.

thanks, you take care.

 

[dazzle11215]

i wish i could make it all better.

all i can do is send a big hug, and let you know i'm thinking of you today.

i care.

 

[MoAnamCara]

Dazzle -

Thank you, too.

Trying to hold it all together this evening.

 

[41021]

How are you holding up sweetie?

**gentle hugs**

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thanks Kali - am holding. More worried about someone else right now.

How are you tonight?

 

[41021]

I can finally sit and type so not doing too bad. Still quite weak, no food very little to drink since friday. Will take a bit to get some energy. ...and thank you. *s**

someone here?

 

[plshelpme]

hope you're hanging in there!!!

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thanks plshelpme

am still holding which is good...

thank you all for your concern

:hug:

 

[MoAnamCara]

I am so sorry everyone, but I need some help tonight please.

Its like a viscious circle and I hate this. I have to stay here but its so difficult. Am starting to have panic attack and am trying to distract but its not working tonight.

Am scared of myself.

 

[Petal]

Hi., have the panic attacks eased off?

 

[MoAnamCara]

They come in waves, like my thoughts. Was okay for about an hour and now my mind is again at top speed, yet I am exhausted. Getting so frustrated with myself.

 

[Petal]

Try something vigorous like exercising, it might help clear your mind.

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thanks

I've been cleaning and organizing drawers & similar.

don't worry, thanks.

 

[Petal]

good job stay safe x

 

[total eclipse]

I care too hun hope you are feeling a little better hugs

 

[MoAnamCara]

********

 

[MoAnamCara]

typing this is as much as I can reach out today

for whatever its worth