donno what the title should be. be careful reading it might trigger.

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Ouroboros, Mar 1, 2011.

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  1. Ouroboros

    Ouroboros Chat Buddy

    when i went to bed last night I felt strange.. this might sound weird.. death was on my mind, it had been most the day. i felt like my body was dead, decomposing.. i know thats kinda stupid coz how the hell would i know what that feels like but thats the only way i can explain. i felt like i was gone but stuck in my body as it rotted, and i could feel it happening. i tried to block it out but i lay there restlessly for a while, while this feeling continued throughout my body. couldn't stay still, when i was still it felt more powerful.. eventually my meds took over and knocked me out.
     
  2. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    :hug: I think I understand. Kinda when things are falling apart inside you maybe. Or a feeling like you are trapped and spiraling down. Maybe the stress is too much and you feel as though its aging you, making you decay. I hope things will get better for you though. Glad you were able to sleep. Take care!
     
  3. Ouroboros

    Ouroboros Chat Buddy

    yeah.. i watch things i shouldn't.. like i'm afraid of the dark coz of all the scary things i imagine to be there.. so maybe something like that influenced the feeling.. and yes.. i am afraid, of time, and well from previous post i made, i despise myself and feel that i am ageing, people think i'm nuts when i tell them. I mean i am technically every day we all are but it feels fast, i feel like i can feel myself dieing, time runs too quickly and yet i'm afraid to move. and no the irony is not lost on me, yes i am sat here wanting to die for feeling the way i do.. its stupid, but i don't want to die slow and painfully like this. urgh. the feeling is still lingering on me. my body.. feels.. urgh.. don't want to be stuck in here.
     
  4. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Well.. stress can put a big toll on you. And in a way it can really age you.. The stress can also feel like a parasite, eating away at you. And slowly killing you. But at some point there will be a break off. And either things will go terribly wrong or things will get better. :hug: Right now I think your trick is to cause that breaking point before it becomes too much and it ends up worse. Maybe try talking more to a therapist or someone about these feelings. I've been there a few times, and it's not fun. But you can get through it. Hope you feel better! :hug:
     
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