Dont kill yourself because it will make those around you unhappy.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Issaccs, Apr 1, 2009.

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  1. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    So Ive always heard that, its like part of the speech on suicide being evil right alongside cowardice and being weak.

    But why am I allowing myself to be alive when even the one person I actually give a shit is being made miserable already.
  2. justafool

    justafool Well-Known Member

    Your life is your own and it doesn't belong to anyone else.

    Don't allow anyone to have any power over you, regardless of what their spoken "good intentions" may be. Their voice is not your voice. The choices are yours.
  3. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    I'm really sorry but I have absolutely no idea what that even means...
  4. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member

    That message doesn't sound supportive at all. Unfortunately people who deal with depression and suicidal impulses are more often than not black holes. We really absorb other people's feelings and are incapable of returning them. Thus, our family and friends get fatigued from dealing with us. It's really shitty and frustrating for them.

    That's not our fault, but we should be forgiving of people for their reactions. It sounds to me like that person is concerned about you, but tired from seeing no progress made. They feel frustrated, ineffectual, and just weary.

    Now that doesn't mean that they'd feel better if you died. They'd feel worse, because they weren't able to stop you and they told you off. The best way to resolve the issue, in my opinion, is to put on your social mask for her/him. Just pretend things are ok, so that she/he can relax. Even if it's not true, pretending is sometimes the nicest thing we can do for our family and friends.
  5. dreamachine

    dreamachine Active Member

    i have read that kind of quote other places.. how you should rid yourself of "toxic" friends and how chronically suicidal people can be "toxic" so it's ok to tell them that and then leave.

    now, this is clearly dependent on the situation, but i think thats a pretty disgusting thing for someone to say. i read it when i was trying to find help for suicidal thoughts. what it was about was that there are people who continually threaten suicide just to keep getting the attention it brings, and i can see how that could be "toxic" to a relationship, but at the same time.. if you care about this person, it doens't make sense that you would just end the friendship, especially if you are so concerned that you don't want them to die.

    i do think obviously people can be brought down by other people being chronically suicidal, but at the same time.. there is so much stigma and misunderstanding about it that i think it's horrible to say you should just give up on suicidal loved ones, even if they seem to never get out of the "black hole." there has to be another option besides giving up on the person, especially (like i said) if you care enough that you don't want them to die.

    sorry i'm rambling, but it is also an issue i struggle with in any "relationships" i have (which is few) because people can't seem to understand. i know i bring them down, and i hate it, and i try to minimize my feelings as much as i can so they don't get tired of dealing with me, but i dunno.. it's something i'm scared of.
  6. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    The person in question is my girlfriend of two years and I never told her about any of my suicidal thoughts, I guess its just obvious.
  7. asri

    asri Well-Known Member

    i think what justafool is trying to say is... u shud start living for urself.

    its not how miserable u r making someone else feel but how miserable u urself r feeling! and u r the only person that can help u.

    do u know, we luv to believe in our weakest moments that we r really helpless n cant do anything. people around us dont want to witness us killing our own spirit and since they r not able to do much they run. and like hell! ur ex girlfriend just did that. she was unable to handle the situation and the only way she thot she cud cope was by ignoring it!

    probably u can now start thinking about urself n starting to live for ur own self? that may bring people back to u?
  8. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    She isnt my ex...
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