I am completely and utterly close to just ending my life. My family is so messed up that all of their faults and problems are blamed towards me. My girlfriend is now cheating on me with her manager. I have to face it. There isn't enough help or drugs in the world that could fill the massive void in my heart and soul. I feel like the world is crashing down on me. I feel like everyone is against me. I have no one to talk to. I don't have the slightest clue on what could make me happy. I've been like this nearly 10 years and nothing seems to work. I want to make all of the pain and suffering go away. I already have my letters written out and labeled. I have already placed <edit moderator total eclipse method>, I was just centimeters away from pulling the trigger. I wanted to so bad. I wanted to end it. I wanted to just die so no one has to put me in a place like this again. I don't know how much time I have left. I don't know how much strength I have left. I just don't know anymore. I want all of it to end.