How can I be so invisible when I need to be seen and so noticeable when all I want is to hide? I'm so alone right now. So alone that I'm pushing my own damn buttons!!! Cant blame anyone but myself though. I keep hiding behind the huge walls I built to protect myself. But I realize now that those very walls are what keep me from reaching out when I really need to. It's one of those very akward moments right now. Been having a lot of them lately. My head is screaming HELP ME!! but my heart and soul are hiding and too scared to call out as well. I fucking hate this!!!!!!!!! Do I cut, pop some pills, drink away the screams for help? Sit here running around the forum hoping to be seen? What the Hell am I supposed to do?