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Don't know what to do with myself..

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Peter, Jan 8, 2008.

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  1. Peter

    Peter New Member

    I have slowly being feeling myself drop lower and lower into myself over the past couple of years I have tried using diaries writing my feelings down and excersie as a way to get rid of my feelings I also resulted to using drugs which when I look back at things is something am not proud of as it just made my situation worse. I want to change and be happy with myself and not have to depend on drugs, but am struggling so badly I have not had a good nights sleep in months and am always awake from around 4 everynight without fail..I've been thinking about killing myself a lot but even though am not close to my family and they dont know what am going through they are the only reason why I have not done this i dont want them to have to go through what am going through now..My mine problem is I dont know why am so down...but I cant do anything anymore and its ruining my life and my university work..all I do is sit down watch tv and imagine the day I die so it can all be over..I want to change but I find it so hard to tell people how I really feel..I dont want them to think am a freak..I just wish I had someone to be there instead of drifing around with my friends constantly wishing I was in an accident or someone would shoot me..am just sick of having no motivation I have lost too many years to it.
  2. Oceans

    Oceans Well-Known Member

    It sounds apart of you wants to get better but you have no motivation to do it and your thoughts are becoming more destructive. You sound like a person who has tried to understand and to find a way to feel better about your life by a writing diary.

    have you seen a doctor, to get some pills for the insommia and chat about your circumstances? at least this will allow you some good nite rest and this may provide some mind space. perhaps you can show your diary to a psychologist or counsellor, because it sounds like you are trying and they may help you out. they won't think you are a freak, they've very likely to have heard it already.

    I'm glad you have recognised the hurt you may cause your family if you were to leave.

    hang in there
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