Dont know what to do.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by pisces1, Sep 24, 2014.

  1. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    I started partial inpatient treatment last week. It consists of four hours a day of group therapy and meeting with a doctor every day. It has been a positive experience thus far, a little overwhelming, but everything has been going well up until today.

    I ended up having to leave after two hours today. I dont know if I had a panic attack or everthing just caught up with me at once, but I don't feel like I can go back now. I have such a hard time being around and talking to others to begin with. Maybe this type of program is not for someone like me. Idk. Just feeling very sad and like I am letting myself down again.

    On top of all of this, my son was in an accident over the weekend. He is ok but he totaled his car. I also saw a new neurologist who is a specialist, yesterday. That did not go well. They dont know what is wrong with me, but did put me on new med for symptoms.

    Just feeling overwhelmed and unsure as to what would be the best thing for me to do, concering the treatment program.
     
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am sorry so much is happening all at once and when you look at that many things all at once it is hard for anybody to deal with it or decide what is best. Just my thoughts here though- you said it had been positive since last week and then had a problem for 2 hours - it would be too bad to let two bad hours count for far more than all the positive time you has spent there. More importantly, it is an opportunity for you to ask the Dr that you see there every day what he thinks happened and see if there is an adjustment that could or should be made for you when having a bad day to get the most out of the therapy. My biggest reason though for thinking you should go and at least talk to them is your statement "Just feeling very sad and like I am letting myself down again" - if you do not go back I am afraid this will be the feeling that sticks with you and that would be too bad if you did really well for days and decide 2 bad hours makes you fail when it is clear that would be like a 90% + and a grade of an A - by percentages. Please do not feel like a failure for getting an "A" with all this other stuff going on.
     
  3. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    Thank you very much for the advice and encouragement. :)
     
  4. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    I decided to go to theraphy today. It went better then I expected, and I am really happy I gave it another try. I will be there for another week or so. Still have a long way to go in getting better, but for once I feel like I am going in the right direction. :)
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi pisces,

    I'm glad you decided to go back, in my opinion that was the best decision and I am so glad it turned out better than expected. Yes..you are on the right road now, the road to recovery! Best of luck to you and keep us updated hun! Also, so glad your son is okay too! :) :hug:
     
  6. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Thanks for th eupdate :) I am really glad that you gave it a try and it went okay for you. I can't tell you how much I hope that they are able to give you some solids ideas for improving the way things are for you and I hope things continue to improve :hug:
     
  7. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    Thank you both so very much. :)
    I look forward to the day I am well enough to return the warmth and care I have been shown hear by all of you. :hugsquish:

    Wishing you all a Beautiful and Peaceful day. :irishdoll:
     
  8. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    Skipped therapy today. Did not feel like I could face others given the way I am feeling, unstable. Also was afraid I would end up commited.
     
  9. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Awww Pisces, as hard as it is, try and find the willpower to go. There's been days when I've woke and said to myself...ugh im going facing that today but after the session I felt so much better. It's for the best hun and in therapy honesty is a must so they can help you. Why are you afraid of being committed? Have you been before? I've been in the psych ward a few times, it wasn't so bad but hun their job is to keep you safe and in time when you look back you will be glad you did the right thing for you. I know it can be extremely hard but remember they are there to help. :)

    Best of luck honey and keep updating us. Good luck :hug:
     
  10. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    If it was one on one therapy, I would have went, but it is group therapy. Just hard to be around others and open up when I feel like this. I think I need to go back to one on one therapy. Going to ask about it tomorrow. I have been committed a few times before and it wasnt that bad. I just dont want to put my kids though that again. Me being gone. I also dont have anyone to look after my youngest. I have just had a really bad day. Tomorrow will be better. Thank you Petals, for your kindness. :hug:
     
  11. pisces1

    pisces1 Well-Known Member

    Went back and all is good. As hard as it is to do this, I know it is what I need to do.