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Dont know what to say. Im done.

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Carver, Nov 25, 2012.

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  1. Carver

    Carver Member


    My names Luke, im in my late 20s. I was last here 5 years ago in June 2007. I managed to turn my life around. I went back to college and got an education, a decent job and a girlfriend. I'd made it. We were living together in a new build 2 bedroom apartment, both earning 20k a year. I was looking at buying a BMW and we were getting ready to book a holiday to Lake Garda in Italy where i was going to ask her to marry me.

    Then 7 months ago she contracted liver disease and it failed nearly killing her. After some nerve wracking time in hospital she was allowed to go home but it was another 5 months before she got better. I was the only one earning so had to work 70 hours a week to keep the roof over our heads. Without her knowing my savings eroded away, my credit card maxed out, i had to sell the car (told her it blew the head gasket) and eventually the ring. Come August the house was on the line so we made plans to move to a house share with some of her friends. Then she broke up with me. After her experience she wanted to enjoy being single more so moved in with her friends by herself. It was only a few weeks after that 'Lance' appeared.

    She abandoned the contract we had with the house and when it failed i had to borrow heavily to settle the agreement. The agent gave notice and i was kicked from the property shortly after. We both worked at the same place but after she split from me work soured against me and i was sacked for gross misconduct on trumped up charges of 'improper time keeping'. I began legal proceedings for unfair dismissal but i couldn't afford to pay for both it and settling the agreement on the house so had to let it go.

    My folks let me come home on to their sitting room floor for a week where i managed to find a cheap house share in east London. With my last pay packet and some borrowed cash from my folks i moved in last month. Straight away i began job hunting and applied for JSA and Housing benefit as the final bills from the failed house arrived. They totaled over £1000+ and my now ex girlfriend and i were supposed to share these bills but shes gone. JSA and Housing benefit were taking their time with my claims despite almost daily calls for information.

    What little money i had left finally ran out last week at the counter in Tesco on my last shopping run. Im down to toast and jam from half a loaf of bread once a day for meals. Im having to wash my hair with hand sanitizer im stealing from a house mate and i haven't been able to take my clothes to the launderette in a week. They itch, i stink and im starving. My folks have cut me off as a disappointment and told me to sort out my own problems. I found out on Friday that JSA and Housing benefit have denied my claim because of a "recent separation" what ever that means but it has something to do with a different claim by my ex girlfriend. My landlord wants the rent by the end of the week or hes going to "do me over if i mess him about" ...

    Ive lost everything. Im facing being rough on the street in east london with large debt by the end of the week. Last night out of the blue i dreamed i was run over by a bus and woke up crying. I've been awake since then thinking about it when i remembered this place. So here i am. I am at the end of knowing what to do or where to turn and im not sure i even want to anymore.
  2. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    I am so sorry to hear of your problems Carver. I wish there was something I could do, practically to help you. I am sorry that your folks have treated you in this way, but they did gave birth to you and must realise that at a time such as this you are in need of their compassion.

    You have got it in you to turn things around, like you did before. You do have strength and perseverance. I have to rush out now, (hubby leaving out the door waiting) but I'll PM later when I get home
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hun i am sorry all this is happening to you. Your parents hun talk to them ok really tell them how you are doing They need to give you more time to heal hun You lost so much a dream a life you had planned for. Hun you can turn this around you can ok. Talk to someone ok that can help you consolidate your debts that can help you decrease payments but talk
    Also hun talk to your doctor to get some help to support you through all this. I am sorry this is all happening hun and i do hope your parents reconsider and help you out THis is not your mess hun you did not expect all this please hun keep talking to us ok hugs
  4. katrina77

    katrina77 Guest

    Wow, Carver, when it rains, it pours. You've sure had your share of problems, and then some.

    I live in US, so not sure what problems exist where you are. Is there any way you can get some financial help through government programs until you can get things sorted out?

    You are one heck of a guy to have done all you could for your girlfriend. Maybe the shock of what she went through just pushed her off track. But you obviously have a lot to offer to others, so hang in there.
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