don't know

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am I alive

Well-Known Member
#1
I have just faild exam,its my 14th try,fuck i'm so fucking stupid, i will never graduate,i'm just wasting time and money,i'm parasite i'm fucking failure in everything i do, I should just digg hole and lay down...
 
#2
What was the subject of the exam? Is it something you're interested in, or a required course of little interest? Some of the most intelligent people I've known quit school and have learned far more on their own than others with degrees. It all depends on the person. If possible, take a break from school and try working, internship, or another activity that provides a change of scenery.

You can always pursue your education later on when you're ready. A good strategy is to find other friends with similar interests, form a group, and attend classes together. The amount of studying and work load becomes so much easier with a group of friends working on the same projects. People often ask how it's possible to handle all the work necessary for masters or PhDs, it's not about intellect it's about willpower, and good friends will be there to help you and motivate you - that's what many of us who weren't blessed with superhuman willpower will need to get through school. Take a rest and enjoy life again, summer will be here soon. Best of luck to you.
 
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Robin

#3
I like what Syd said, some people do better without school though I would still highly recommend it. We each have our own strengths and weaknesses, no man is an empire unto himself, the trick is twofold, finding what you're great at and making it put food on the table. Am here if you want to talk more about this :hug:
 
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reborn1961

#4
I am not sure where you live or if you are high school or college. I do know that some schools will subsitute an oral test or narrative test vs a multiple choice. It is not done often but a friend of mine had this done to graduate college as she was a lousy test taker but still knew her stuff.

It may be worth a try. I know it sucks right now but for every time you took the exam you gained more knowledge. You may become more of an expert on the subject by testing several times than those who tested once. I wish you the best of luck.
 

am I alive

Well-Known Member
#5
I'm student of faculty(you say college)of economics in Belgrade (Serbia-southeastern Europe).
I'm at my fourth year (8th semestre). This is very poor country and withouth degree there are minimum chanses to find job, maybe only extremly low paid job, and if i tell you that average wage is about 300$ you know whats that mean,for the rest of my life i will have to work some shitty job for minimum wage. I'm 25, i'm studying for almost 7 year , and if i leave, it will be all in vain. I'm relatevely near to finish, and i know i have to find strenght to do it,i'm trying but because of depression i just can't. As many people here i have no social life,no close friends,no gf, no job,still live with parents etc.,and my dad is alcoholic since i was born.Also i hate place where i live, i was born in Croatia but because of war we have moved here.
For about a one year i have suicidal thoughts, and its not easy concentrate to college when you know you can die every moment.

Thank you all for replies...
 
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Robin

#6
I don't think you're stupid at all, far from it. Depression makes everything so much more difficult to cope with and I understand how hard it is to try to motivate yourself into studying for your course. I am glad you have stable living conditions but I'm sorry that your fatehr likes to drink alcohol so much, I know that's one stress you could do without. I do want to commend you for fighting so hard and I wonder if there is anyone you could afford to see to talk to about your problems maybe? I know thinghs must be tight financially but it was just a hope, something I am prone to doing from time to time. Take care and be safe :hug:
 

am I alive

Well-Known Member
#7
Thanks for such a kind words Robin. I have few friends, but i'm trying to avoid talking about myself,i just pretend im happy. I don't know why, it seems like i don't want any help. I have lost motivation to help myself,i feel good only when i hurt myself.I can't see myself as a husbund or father,just can't, its out of range for me... I'm just complaning about my life here on SF where nobody knows me,though i know nobody will help me because i don't want help myself
 
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Robin

#8
It's good to have a place or a person to vent to, better still to be heard, just wanted you to know that I both heard you and understand to a degree how you feel.
 
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