Don't wanna go back to the hospital.

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Not doing well. May go back to the hospital. I really don't want to, I enjoy my freedom and music... I want to die. But I don't want to hurt anyone. I feel so trapped. I really thought I could be normal but its like bipolar is a curse on me. Take meds forever or suffer. Obviously my meds aren't working.

I think I'll go pack my bag before i kill someone/myself. Hospital might not be such a bad choice at this rate. Or I could self harm.... but that's not rational. I hate myself. I hate this sh*t. Up, down, all around.... When does the ride stop??


Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend
I think you are doing the right thing going back to the hospital..Take a book to kill time..As you know you do alot of waiting..They will keep nyou safe and help you set up support for when you get out..
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