Hi, Im Thomas, the reason behind my title is because I am literally counting down the weeks until I go - or I should say - want to go. Something small happened to me - well its massive to me - but small in everyone elses eyes but something clicked inside me last September and ever since then I haven't been thinking right. Now all I want is out. I have tried before a few years ago with <Mod Edit, WildCherry: Methods> but all that gave me was yellow eyes and a bad stomach for days. This time I have found a sure fire way of doing it - and there is a pun in that last line - that I can't make a mistake. I've been to the samaritans, i've been put on antidepressants (which made it worse) and now my Dr wants me to talk to someone but in all honesty, I couldn't really care. I've read so many sites for help that im getting bored hearing the same thing. "Time heals all" and everything else but what happens when you don't want that time? Knowing I will have to spend the rest of my life knowing things I wish I never knew, so instead i'm going to solve the problem completly. Whatever help you give, I will listen, I promise.